


The Boarding School Mess

by plaidandbowties



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Boarding School, Alternate Universe - High School, Bi-Curiosity, Dean is a Cock Tease, F/F, Fluff and Smut, Gay Sex, High School, Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, References to Drugs, Shoplifting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-12
Updated: 2015-12-25
Packaged: 2018-03-22 14:41:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 13
Words: 21,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3732685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/plaidandbowties/pseuds/plaidandbowties
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The story begins with two boys. One who's a little broken, and one who's a little lost. But together, they make each other better. One see's the stars in the others eyes and one smells the fresh summer air in the others hair. Together, all their feelings collide and their thoughts mold into one.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Highway to room 666

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t own Dean. I don’t own Castiel. I don’t own either one of them. I don’t mean to cause harm, confusion or headaches. Also, please don’t sue me…I don’t do well in jail and I have no money... Basically I'm writing this for all you lovies, but I own nothing except for stuff you don't recognize. Is that okay?

Chapter 1 : Highway to room 666

 

Dean Winchester, your typical everyday 'cool kid' (or so _he_ thought), was sitting shotgun in his father's impala. They were moving, for what felt like the twelfth time in Deans life. He had gotten used to it by now, the constant switching homes; but that doesn't mean it didn't piss him off. Sometimes he wished that for once his dad would settle down and stop running away from the past. However, that was all it could ever be; a dream. 

 

The purr of the impala kept the silence of the whole situation at bay. Everyone was lost in their own thoughts and feelings. Dean's little brother Sam was sleeping in the back seat, Dean liked to think the move wouldn't effect him that much. However, from the dark circles under his little brother Sammy's eyes, the exact opposite could be told.

 

Dean groaned, new home always meant he would be attending a new high school; this time some high and mighty boarding school called Abbadon High. The only good thing about that stuffy, snob-school would be the fact that Dean could get his own room. Dean had wanted his own room for as long as he could remember; he used to always share it with Sammy... Don't get him wrong! He loved his little brother like nobody else but, some things could get awkward when you shared a room with a younger sibling.

 

Sometimes he just wanted something that could be his own, something he didn't always have to share.

 

The car came to a steady halt, they had arrived; Dean would be the only one leaving the car, though. Sammy was going to another school, a school for gifted smart kids, a school that Dean could never get into. Dean got out of the car and slammed the door. He went to the trunk and he and his father took out his things. The feeling of regret and past choices clouded both their perspectives.

 

"I can carry it all to my room," Dean stated bluntly already holding onto his suitcase and luggage. He wasn't in the mood of taking help from the man who was sentencing him to his death. 

 

"Have a nice year." John sighed and his back stiffened, their father wasn't really all cut out for the father-son moments. Without another word, John stepped into the impala and drove away, not looking back. Dean was used to it, in fact he didn't expect nothing less. Their cold, and frigid father preferred sending them off to a school for an entire year. Never actually taking care of them both, then having to watch over them and cook for them every night. For John Winchester, easy choices came at an easy cost. 

 

"Yeah, good bye to you too," Dean mumbled, he grabbed his stuff and started walking to the room he was assigned.

 

The school was surprisingly huge, and the hallways were eerily confusing. His mind and body was slowly stumbling looking for direction. After looking at a map, he even realized he wasn't on the right floor. After about half an hour, he neared his room.

 

"664, no," He sighed.

 

"665, no...." Dean mumbled.

 

"666, there we are." He greeted his room grinning. It was quite a funny room number, some satanic mumbo jumbo he had heard of somewhere that one time. Turning the door handle he trudged inside, not expecting to see his room divided in half with another person sitting on the other bed.

 

"Uh, who are you?" Dean coughed awkwardly, his dreams of having his own room suddenly fell to the pit of his stomach. Of course, that's how it would always be. Just a silly dream. He never really could get anything he wanted, not really. It was one of the curses of being him. Good looks with shit luck. 

 

"I believe I'm your- uh, roommate..." The boy answered shyly. Dean nodded, he was slightly disappointed but he hid it well.

 

"Name?" He asked, swinging his bags carelessly onto his bed.

 

"Castiel, yours?" Castiel answered, putting his hands on his lap; he was already wearing the school uniform. Some pants and a navy blue button down blouse.

 

What a nerd.

 

"Well, Cas, I'm Dean. Dean Winchester." Dean answered and Castiel nodded and took out a book from his library. Castiel's stuff was already all prepared with a stack of books that looked familiarly like school books, neatly stacked on the floor beside his bed. Dean could tell that this guy had the social life of an old man with muscles of a two year old.

 

"Any friends?" Dean asked after a bit of silence. He had finally finished emptying his first suitcase and was moving onto making his bed; Dean bent over to stuff the bed sheet in the corner.

 

"No, not really..." Castiel muttered, taking silent glances at the view of those tight jeans he was offered, but he quickly returned to his book.

 

About an hour went by while neither of them spoke, and Dean had finally finished arranging his stuff when a knock came at the door. He went to answer it, but instead a teenage boy just opened it and ran right past him and onto Cas's bed.

 

"Hello Cassy what's cooking?" Laughed the older boy messing up Castiels hair. The older one had longer hair, and brown eyes that shown in the sunlight. He seemed like a happy, careless, and over all an easy going guy. However Dean knew that this guy had an undertone of something darker and more mysterious. 

 

"Technically, nothing is cooking Gabriel," Castiel answered, to which the older one rolled his eyes. Dean stifled a laugh at the failed attempt at a conversation.

 

"I thought you said you didn't have friends." Dean spoke at the two raising an eye brow teasingly.

 

"He doesn't," answered the taller one before unwrapping a lollipop and sticking it into his mouth.

 

"I don't." Castiel sighed, "this is my brother, Gabriel." Cas gave an apologetic look to Dean. Dean understood that look, he would give it very often. Everyone, but especially Dean, knew how family was, you didn't get to pick them. Sometimes life was fair and gave you an easy family with a polite husband and a stay at home mom. Sometimes life gave you an attention seeking brother with a serious candy issue, and sometimes life handed you a shitty alcoholic father, Dean understood how Cas could feel ashamed of his family.

 

"Well.... Time flies when you're having fun. I'm leaving!" Gabriel answered sarcastically and rushed through the door before anybody could say anything else. He probably had other stuff to get to, like setting some toilet paper on fire with his friends.

 

"Time doesn't- oh whatever," was Castiel's only answer.

 

“He seems... Nice.” Dean told Cas; he had found the whole situation quite shitty, he even felt a little sad for Cas.

 

“If you like terrorizing half of the students in this school,” the blue eyed boy sighed, “then you and him would get along great.”

 

Dean sat on his bed facing Castiel. He was a very particular boy, and to Dean, that was a new one. Cas was shy, in a cute way and cute, in a scary way. He had the bluest eyes to ever blue and dark hair that made them stand out. He was quite gorgeous. Recently Dean had been finding a lot of guys attractive, he blamed it on the hormones.

 

Yeah, that had to be it. 

 

“He sounds like a special deranged snowflake,” muttered Dean, lying down onto his bed with a sigh.

 

“Aren't we all?” mumbled Castiel, under his breath, diving into his book till the light of the morning.


	2. A Cocktail of Anxiety

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t own Dean. I don’t own Castiel. I don’t own either one of them. I don’t mean to cause harm, confusion or headaches. Also, please don’t sue me…I don’t do well in jail and I have no money... Basically I'm writing this for all you lovies, but I own nothing except for stuff you don't recognize. Is that okay?
> 
> Also, I'd like it to be noticed that no reposting of this fic is allowed. If someone would like to read it just send them here.

Kevin Tran was sitting shotgun in his mom's minivan, his head was swarming with thoughts of this new school and he couldn't get anything coherently out of his mouth without stuttering. This was why his head was silently banging a little against the window and his fingers were tapping rhythmically against the car door frame.

 

You could say that he was a special cocktail of anxiety and excitement which was all boiling down to a slow simmer of stress and sweat. 

 

Kevin knew he his mom had standards for his academic achievements, and he had (as always) raised the bar even higher with his own expectations. His 95% average would have to be nothing less than a 97% average. Anything less could not be tolerated, and he wouldn't live with himself if his grades went under a 90% average. In fact he'd rather walk in front of a bus if his grades ever went _that_ low.

 

The car pulled into the driveway, it seemed like an okay school. Sure it was nothing like the posh private school he used to go to, but his mom wasn't rich, and he'd prefer go to an excellent college even if it meant spending the year in an average boarding school. The school was separated into three buildings. Kevin knew how the whole school was mapped out, he had studied it to make sure he would never be late for a class. Being late for class would not be something he could accept, it would mean his perfect attendance would be screwed. In the first building were the dorms, each room would be split into halves which would be shared with a roommate. The second building had most of the classrooms, and the third building had staff dorms but students would only be allowed access to the gym.

 

Kevin's eye twitched with nervousness, they both got out of the car and since he had the muscles of a two year old he asked his mom to help him bring his bags up to his new room.  The marble steps that made up most of the school left Kevin in awe, he knew he would walk these steps many times but this was the first time and he wanted to remember it. He couldn't wait to get his nose into the library and learn some new information, he couldn't wait to feel excited for his exams and tests.

 

He was so blinded that when he opened the door to his room, he only heard his mom gasp and he didn't know why. It took him a few seconds to understand.

 

“Hey there!” A red headed girl popped up from behind her laptop. She was lying down on her bed in her pajamas, she seemed pretty laid back, her long hair was down and a pair of sweats were on the floor waiting to be worn. There was left over pizza on the desk next to her and a trail of crumbs from the floor to her shirt.

 

“Hi...” Kevin stuttered, not really sure if he should be happy to room with a girl or not. However, before he could give it a second thought his mom spoke up.

 

“This isn't right,” she muttered confused “Excuse me? Where is the boy 'Charlie' that Kevin is supposed to room with? I'm assuming we must of mistaken rooms...”

 

“Oh no! I'm Charlie! You'll be rooming with me.” She stood up with a smile and looked kindly at Kevin, "There are a few rules we should establish first, okay basically-" but Charlie didn't have time to finish as Mrs. Tran interrupted her sentence. 

 

“How can that be? I had arranged for Kevin to room with a b-” Mrs. Tran started but was cut off midway by Charlie who was slightly irritated.  

 

“Actually, there was no place where that it was specifically written. What _is_ written is in some rare cases if the number of boy to girls isn't even, the school has the right to put two people of the opposite sex together. As long as these two people can maintain a high academic average and both consent to rooming together, it's perfectly fine.” Charlie smiled her eyes sparkling. “Also, I mean I wouldn't worry much about it Mrs. Tran, considering I am sure to not have any relationship apart from friendship with your son, no offense.” Kevin's back stiffened to that comment. He felt a little offended and his ego hurt a little, but then again he knew that a girl like Charlie was more of the 'cool friend' type. Not exactly his idea of the perfect girl. Mrs. Tran obviously wasn't impressed.

 

“How can you be sure? Relationships can happen spontaneously and without any notice. You could take advantage of my boy. Besides, how do I know you're not lying?” Mrs. Tran snapped with an aggressive undertone, she was still not buying everything Charlie said.

 

“Don't get me wrong, he seems like a good guy. But I can assure you that a relationship beyond friendship is very unlikely, and I don't lie as often as most people assume.” Charlie answered with a smirk.

 

“And how can you be so sure?” Mrs. Tran commented, her back still against the door way. It was quite obvious that this was a make it or break it moment. Kevin held in his breath in hope that his roommate had a good excuse.

 

“I'm gay.” Charlie chuckled. "I don't think Kevin has enough boobs to be my type." To her surprise Mrs. Tran burst out laughing and even Kevin seemed a little reassured. Besides, he knew a relationship could very easily destroy all his academic goals. He knew how love could twist a good mind. He wasn't ready to take that risk, not with anyone. 

 

“Well, that is one problem fixed.” Kevin's mom answered making her way into the room and dropping all of Kevin's stuff onto his bed, “Charlie would you be a dear and get the bags near the door? Kevin has more brains than muscles and sometimes it's the opposite that I need.”

 

 


	3. The mystery with a sob story

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, I own nothing but my own Ideas. Notice that no reposting of this fanfic is allowed. It's very simple to send people to read it here. Please enjoy this chapter.

Dean Winchester had trouble waking up the next morning, it's not like any morning was exactly easier though. Mornings were mornings, and Dean preferred night over day, those were the facts. Even though some mornings were easier getting up to, and even though some nights were rough and tough to live through. Dean had made his choice as a night owl.

 

8:00 gleamed the alarm clock, and class started in fifteen minutes.

 

Today was going to be one of the tougher mornings. 

 

“Fuck,” Dean muttered under his breath, as he quickly put on a shirt and slid on some pants. He splashed his face with some cold water from their bathroom sink hoping it would wake him up a little. Realizing that he had put on a normal outfit he cursed and took an extra ten minutes finding his school dress attire, then another five minutes putting it on.

 

Leaving the room, Dean noticed that Cas was already gone, the pile of books stacked beside his bed, also gone. Great, he really was rooming with a nerd. With one last sigh Dean shut his door, not knowing he had forgotten his keys inside.

 

No one noticed the way both beds were made. Dean's was made military style, everything was tucked a certain way, even his clothes were piled neatly at the end. However, Castiel's bed was made in a rush, someone in a hurry to leave the house and not look back. No one noticed how different these boys were, and no one noticed the small details. 

 

Dean's first class of the day was English, something he didn't excel at or even enjoy. English was held in room 401, the teacher Miss Mills was a nice enough lady, but with a sharp temper for trouble makers. So obviously Dean was on her hate list the minute he arrived late to her class.

 

“Slept well Mr. Winchester?” She called out to Dean when he stepped foot in her classroom. He sighed, all of the students were already staring at him. Obviously she knew his name because he was the only one missing.

 

Well, if a new school meant new start, this was a pretty horrible start. 

 

“Fabulously.” He answered giving her his prize wining smile, “Please, call me Dean.” He answered winking. A couple giggles and audible gasps escaped the mouth of the students in the class. however the only thing he paid any attention to was those two blue eyes rolling to the back of Castiel's head.

 

“To your seat _Mr. Winchester_ or I'll have to _fabulously_ send you to the principals office.” The teacher spoke pointing to his seat in the back right corner, right beside Castiel, which stiffled a laugh.

 

Dean took his seat and swung his stuff onto his desk. He had brought the necessities: gum, pencil, some paper, and a comic book.

 

“As I was saying, new project, you've got two minutes to choose your partners,” Miss. Mills stated, the second she finished talking the whole class erupted in loud chatting. Everyone had known each other for ages, which left Dean alone. He fiddled with his pen and paper, Sammy was the artsy one but he still liked to doodle.

 

His pencil glided onto his only piece of paper. He drew shapes and those shapes became something bigger. He didn't have time to finish the drawing to elaborate it into anything more. 

 

Two minutes passed when the teacher finally spoke once again, “ Alright, who's alone?” Dean raised his hand and looked around the room only to find Castiel with his hand up staring intently at Dean.

 

“Guess I found a _fabulous_ partner,” Dean teased a little but Cas merely nodded. 

 

Castiel seemed to not be enjoying the new company, but that was only an illusion. 

 

And so the day went on and both of them didn't really talk to each other. The boys ate alone at separate tables, both of them too confused about their own problems. Both of them miserable and alone.

 

They even had different classes this afternoon. Dean was feared in most of his classes and he enjoyed it quite a bit. Cas on the other hand was stumbling through hallways and rushing to class afraid of being teased. 

 

Dean didn't really talk to anybody else that day, half the school thought he was bad news and the other half wanted to be him. As a side note, not that he would necessarily admit it, but he missed Sammy and his father. He missed the smell of the Impala and he missed hugging his little brother good night. Sammy was one of those people that Dean could hold onto. Sam was the only Winchester who didn't let him down, he might be the only Winchester who actually loved Dean too. 

 

However, Castiel was dreading having to see his family again, Gabriel was always on his back and Lucie would pick on him whenever she had the chance. Castiel was okay alone, and he had roomed a couple years alone till the new kid came along, those beautiful green eyes, and that round arse. However, Cas remembered what happened when he tried explaining his sexuality to his parents: they shut him down. Said that the first boy he brought home would be the last time he came home. So Cas stayed alone, not really talking to people, who needs more assholes in their lives?

 

Somehow Dean stuck to him, not his usual type, to normal people Dean had short hair and looked like a trouble maker. To Cas, Dean had gorgeous green eyes that sparkled in the sunlight, and when Dean slept Cas had noticed that Dean had little freckles mapped across his cheeks like constellations to the stars. To Castiel, Dean was a mystery, filled with a sob story, and Cas found that curious.

 

The library was quiet that night, nobody usually stayed there past 9 o'clock but Castiel enjoyed it. He loved to start reading a book at three in the afternoon and losing track of time. No one bothered him, in fact, the librarian knew him very well and some nights past ten he'd throw him the keys and told him to lock the door behind him. Cas didn't mind, he enjoyed the peacefulness of it all.

 

That's were Castiel was that night. He was fumbling the covers of old books, and smelling the musk of new ones. He settled down for a classic mystery book and read till around 4 am.

 

Finally after finishing off his late night reading in the library, Castiel walked to his dorm, only to find his roommate asleep on the floor in front of their door.

 

Maybe that air of trouble making wasn't just a rumor. 

 

Confused, and discouraged Castiel shook him a bit, and Dean woke up. Dean's eyes fluttered open and his lips pursed as he passed a hand in front of his face trying to wipe off the tiredness. 

 

“Hello Dean.” Cas muttered to the half conscious boy he had lying on his dorm room entrance. To be fair, Cas would have great difficulty entering his room without moving Dean.

 

He wasn't helping Dean or anything.

 

“Damn Cas you know how to wake a guy... Hey, I wanted to know if you could open the door.” Dean answered vaguely, Castiel had confusion written all over his face.

 

“Why would you want me to open the door for you?” Cas answered blushing a little. He wasn't totally sure he understood the correct situation. To this Dean gave him an exasperated look.

 

“Because I forgot my keys somewhere,” Dean laughed, “and sleeping on our dorm room entrance seemed like the best solution.” To this Castiel snickered, he paused and unlocked the door. He'd had a casual conversation with his roommate and to him that sounded like progress. The joyful aura that Dean carried around in his back pocket mesmerized Cas. He wanted to get to know Dean more. 

 

“Hey man?” Asked Dean already sprawled onto his bed, something shiny across the room caught his attention and he noted that the next morning this would be the first place he would look for his keys.

 

“I thought we were past the stage of introductions?” Castiel answered and Dean yawned.

 

“Yeah,” Dean stretched over and flicked off their light “Good night Cas.”

 

Castiel sighed, he hadn't even done his homework yet, but he didn't intend to do anything in the dark, it was pretty late too. Castiel observed Dean for a little bit, looking at those fine details: the chiseled jaw line, the naturally spiky hair...

 

“Cas that's _creepy_.” A small smile grew on Deans puffy lips.

 

Embarrassed, Cas could only stutter a small “Good Night Dean” before stripping off his clothes and falling asleep in his boxers. Dean fell asleep in his school clothes obviously too tired to give a damn. 

 


	4. Three Lesbians and Two Thieves

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: drug mention, alcohol mention, cigar mention, shoplifting mention and cigarettes mention. 
> 
> I AM SO SORRY BUT I AM VERY LATE ON THIS. (Also why I'll be posting two chapters as an apology :3) 
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own them, I own this fic. Don't fucking be rude and steal it.

 

Charlie Bradbury has not had it so easy.

She started out as a computer geek, until she realized that she could probably do whatever she wanted and get away with it. But everything became _more_ interesting when she became aware that even when she got in trouble she could control the situation.

“Hey where are _you_ going?” She heard a groggy Kevin mutter. He was waking up, it was nearly ten in the morning and she had been trying to leave unnoticed. He wasn't aware of all her explicit activities and she rather enjoyed keeping it like that. Kevin seemed to like people with clean slates who doesn't really like Charlie's kind. Plus, if word got out about her she could have a huge mess to clean up. 

“Out-side.”” she exaggerated a fascinated expression, " you should try it sometime. It's a nice place." 

“Where outside?” Kevin grumbled as he sat up in his bed .

“For crying out loud, the store Kevin. Where else?” Charlie spoke in a reassuring tone.

“Oh,” Kevin looked around a little confused, “you woke me up for this?”

“Are you kidding me right now,” Charlie sighed shaking her head, “I'm leaving now, bye, biatch!” Without another word she was out the door.

Kevin only grumbled and fell back fast asleep.

***

She was going to the store, just not exactly buying anything. The first times her heart pounded in her chest and she would freak out a bit, but by now she was used to shop lifting. She adored it, and Charlie Bradbury had to give herself credit, she was really quite good at it.

Yeah, she would tell people that her motto was to demolish the higher class and give food back to the lower class. She even liked to think of herself as a modern Robin Hood. Truth be told, she learnt at a young age and it sort of followed her around. Before it was survival, now it was a little more about making some money off of her classmates.

She entered the store, he heart jumped a little but she calmed herself. She had done this a thousand and one times and she sure as hell could do it as easily today. Charlie had a ritual to her completely perfected technique. It worked every time and she could always pull it off. And that's exactly the routine she'd be using today.

_First, she'd conduct thorough research of the building._

Back doors? How many staff worked at once? Do they tag everything? Was she going to need a hook or a magnet? She had taken this all into consideration last night. She knew about every nook and cranny. 

_Second, she'd prepare accordingly._

She had a pretty over sized back pack that she was used to carrying. Her plan today was a hit and run.

_Third, upon entering the store she'd see who she was dealing with today._

The guy at the counter didn't even lift his head, he was a teen who had probably dropped out. He didn't really care much about anything other than that rolled up joint in his pocket that he was planning on smoking at his break. He was one of those kids that sort of went about life one day at a time, even if that meant endangering tomorrow.

_Fourth, she'll make sure the isle that she was attacking was safely in the blind eye of any other customer._

She walked to the alcohol isle, looking across skeptically. This was going to be an easy and fun day. Two camera's were looking directly at her. She knew no one was on the other side of those camera's, and she'd be erasing the tape they had filmed of her later.

_Fifth, get everything she needs, and quickly._

Charlie rushed through that big brain of hers and found her mental list of what she needed to bring.

The senior Balthazar was willing to pay her finely for expensive wine.

She put two bottles in her back pack.

Bela Talbot was going to pay her generously for a bottle of whiskey.

Put three small flasks in her bag. It was beginning to be heavy. Charlie knew she could handle a few more bottles. Plus, she liked to take extra because there were always a few kids around the school that would buy whatever she had left over.

Meg Masters in Dean's year liked Vodka, Charlie took two bottles.

The guy at the counter was still reading his book, he didn't seem to care. Charlie grinned at the camera.

Last but not least she took a few bottles of Smirnoff poppers, they always turned out useful.

She put a few in her bag and zipped it shut. It was pretty packed in there, but it was the same weight as usual.

_Sixth, get the fuck out and don't get caught._

Charlie's head was racing and her breath was rough as she sneaked out back and made a steady escape. Nobody noticed anything. She was on a streak!

It was all in a days work. She half walked half sprinted her way back to school. Then she began making deliveries. It was about noon when she arrived at Balthazar's dorm. She knocked on the door and waited for an answer. A few seconds after, he opened the door.

“Yes Charlie, is there a special reason why you're bothering me at this hour?” He teased. He had his hair ruffled and Charlie was pretty sure she saw a girls outline under the covered.

“You do know it's noon right?” Charlie snicked as she let her self inside, Balthazar closed the door shut.

“Oh fuck, don't I have classes?”

“Unless you go to church.”

“Huh?”

“It's Sunday.”

“Oh,” He paused and grew confused for a second, “So why are you here?”

“Don't you remember your order?” She sighed but shuffled through her bag and drew out both bottles. A smirk grew on Balthazar's face, he recognized what he wanted. He gently took the bottles and hid them in his drawer. Then he dropped a twenty dollar bill into Charlie's hand.

“You're kidding right?” She baffled, “I don't risk my neck for two hundred dollars worth of wine, for twenty dollars.”

He exaggerated a sigh and gave her another twenty dollars, “go buy yourself something nice?” He drawled.

Soon after that Charlie left, and made her way to Bela's room.

She almost knocked on the door when another girl opened it. The girl paused and winked at Bela, “I'll see you next time?” She giggled.

“Sure darling.” Bela smirked and gave the girl a kiss on the cheek.

Bela was the kind of girl who fooled around with just about anyone. She never stayed at one precise place, and more importantly she ran the other half of Charlie's “business”. Bela ran the cigar, cigarette, and weed (If you knew how to ask politely) industry at their school . Both girls knew each other and they both knew not to go into the other's territory. Bela didn't steal or sell any alcohol, and Charlie never sold a cigar to anyone.

Upon leaving, the girl turned around and noticed Charlie watching them. She winked at her too, and put an hand on her shoulder.

“You can join us too, it'll but much fun.” She laughed and exited. Charlie was bright red as Bela let out a laugh.

“I'd uh..” Charlie stuttered as she walked into Bela's room. The curtains were drawn and her roommate was not present.

“It's alright if you “don't swing that way”,” Bela sighed looking at the grown, “just ignore her.”

“No uh,” Charlie coughed a few times to clear her throat, “ I'm gay but I'm here on business.” Trying to charm her way out of this situation.

“I doubt you're gay,” Bela laughed, “you hardly look the type.”

“Rude!” Charlie exclaimed.

“But I mean, if you are...” Bela sat on her bed, “then you wouldn't mind kissing me? Just for science of course.”

Charlie laughed, “I smell a motherfucking challenge”

Charlie sat on the bed beside Bela and ran a hand through her silky hair. Bela was the one who closed in and pressed her lips onto Charlie's. Charlie's who body tingled and her eyelashes fluttered. However, one second to the next Bela had pulled away, leaving Charlie a little unsatisfied.

“Interesting...” Bela muttered softly.   
  
“Very,” Charlie smirked and grabbed her bag, “I hope you're not too stunned to buy my merch?” She laughed and pulled out two bottles of whiskey, keeping one for someone else.

“Ah yes,” Bela muttered and gave Charlie thirty dollars before taking her bottles to the closet. Where she kept the rest of her stuff. Charlie curiously looked in and saw a few packs of cigars and cigaretts as well as a jar filled with prerolled joints.

“Want anything?” Bela mused. Charlie considered it heavily and ended up buying a simple pack of cigars for five dollars. Mostly to spend more time with Bela that is.

***

Charlie ended up making a few other errands that day. Meg bought her bottle of vodka, and Charlie kept the rest for herself for now. But her stop with Bela was the one that she was still a little stunned about. Did Bela want to kiss her? Maybe it was a coincidence? Did she linger for too long? 

_Oh. My. God_

Those _Lips._

She walked back to her dorm not really paying attention to anything in particular, once inside she stumbled upon Kevin.

“Where were you all day?” He questioned.

“You do know you're not my mother right?” Charlie sassed to which Kevin rolled his eyes, “Oh good, for a second there I was worried.”

Charlie and Kevin made a little small talk, but nothing more. They were still getting used to being together in a room.

Once she was on her laptop she deleted the film that the shop had taken of her and counted her profit. She had made about a hundred dollars. Surprisingly she had made quite a lot and was proud with her days work. She stuffed the money inside her pillow with the rest, and calmly lied down. She had one thing on her mind, or rather, one person. 


	5. Of Nerds, Slurs and Alcohol.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is that other chapter I promised as a sorry for forgetting to post :3 
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own these characters, but I did write this. Don't be an asshole and steal it. Just send them here. Like seriously bro.

 

A few weeks passed, they were already nearing the end of September. Cas had grown on Dean, they were both doing their English project together, and enjoyed each others company. Dean loved making Castiel smile and Castiel loved Dean's jokes.

 

Dean was concerned for Castiel, he knew the look, the look when you've had a tough time. To that, all Dean could do was look after him, he even felt the need to protect him. Time went by and they became friends. Dean also noticed that he'd started to have feelings for Castiel, feelings he'd never really felt before for anybody else. However, he decided to shove those feelings in the pit of his stomach, there was no way Castiel could feel the same way.

 

Somehow, Cas did. Castiel enjoyed Deans company, he loved the way Dean treated him. He loved the friendship they had grown, but Cas knew, whenever he got too close to people, they always got hurt. So he tried to keep his distance, he could be sometimes cold, but Castiel loved Dean. He loved everything about Dean, and he hated himself for it, his family hated it, but he loved the feeling. He loved the way Dean could pout when he wanted something, or the way Dean's eyebrows would furrow when they worked on their project and he didn't understand much.

 

They both loved their friendship and didn't want to hurt it by making it something else, but they both wanted it to be something else, something bigger. Even if Dean didn't want to believe it, even if Cas didn't want to hurt Dean. Dean loved Cas, and Cas loved Dean. It was like a goddamn tragedy, Dean looked at Cas and saw pain, Cas looked at Dean and felt love but both thought the other was just offering pity.

 

Nearly two days after they had met, both boys had begun eating with each other at lunch. By the end of September they were still doing so together, they were both happy. At that day at lunch, Dean sat down waiting for Cas, he calmly took his lunch food and almost began to bite into his burger when he heard yelling from the other side of the cafeteria.

 

A lunch tray hit the ground.

 

“Poor Castiel, now I'm going to ask you again, will you be doing _my_ English project or not?” came a cackle from where the situation was happening. An audible “Ooow!” could be heard as a body hit the ground. Dean went into panic and stood up, his only friend was being bullied. The same surge of adrenaline whenever Sam was hurt rushed into Dean.

 

“Leave him alone you son of a bitch!” Dean yelled before Castiel could do anything else. The heads that were taunting Cas turned to Dean. A girl was the main ring leader, and she was followed by a few crooks. She had dirty blond short hair, and piercing eyes that made you wonder why she wasn't in an asylum.

 

“Or what?” Asked the attacker.

 

“Or me-” Dean growled pointing to himself “-and your stupid ass are going to have a problem.” Dean pointed his finger to the bully's chest. Without another word Dean calmly walked into the center of the fight and offered a hand to Castiel who obviously needed it. Castiel lip was open in the middle, but oddly enough it didn't seem to bother him. Cas didn't even acknowledge it being there, and this worried Dean a lot. Dean put his arm around Castiel's shoulders and started walking slowly, they only walked about two steps when the asshole finally fell out of shock; she was reasonably smaller than Dean, but had an air of hate.

 

“Go on, Castiel! Escape with your boyfriend, someday he won't be there to protect you, little baby...” taunted the bully. Castiel ignored her and Dean, well Dean tried not to hit the girl, for the idiot's sake. Deans hands were shaking as he balled them into fists.

 

“Ha..” The bully snickered. “Fag!” Yelled the boy in a final attempt to receive a reaction from Cas, but Castiel didn't give in to the insults. In fact, Dean was the one who reacted on his emotions. Before the bully could say anything else, her body was a lump on the floor. Swiftly Dean had gone from Castiel's side and had punched the other girl so hard on the side of head that she was out cold.

 

Some things worried Castiel on the way to their dorm: the way Dean hit, that he knew how to hit, and hard. The next thing that worried Cas was the way Dean was loyal, dangerously loyal, ready to put himself in danger for him, yet they had only known each other for three to four weeks. Lastly, what excited Cas the most, and he can't help get little butterflies in his stomach because of it, was the fact that Dean never said anything _against_ being his boyfriend.

 

Cas was worried, if only Dean knew who the bully was. If only Dean knew how this wasn't the first time she had hit Castiel.

 

The both walked in total silence, till they reached their dorm. Dean unlocked the door, still holding on to Cas, when the door opened and he locked it behind them, then and only then did he let go. Dean sighed and rubbed his sore knuckles, as Cas sat on his own bed.

 

“Thank you Dean,” muttered Cas after a little awkward silence. To this Dean smiled, making Castiel blush.

 

“Anytime," answered Dean simply, shrugging the whole situation off.

 

Both of them mutually agreed that class and school could wait another day, Dean needed some time to calm down, and Castiel needed sometime to recharge.

 

Dean got out of his school clothes, pulling on a pair of pajama pants. A knock in their room door was heard and, shirtless, Dean answered the door. It was obvious Cas wasn't going to do so as he already had his nose stuffed in a book.

 

“Uh, hello I'm Charlie?” The girl on the other side of the door spoke up. She seemed sort of awkward. Charlie had flaming red hair, big curious eyes and a small delicate silhouette. Dean knew a few things about her: the boys in his class called her the "hot" computer geek, a surprising amount of boys in the school were crushing hard on her, and, coincidentally, she dated none of them.

 

“Charlie?” Cas mumbled, she came rushing in.

 

“I just wanted to see that you were okay!” She answered hugging Cas. Dean stood on the side of the situation.

 

“Anybody wanna cue me in?” Dean asked sarcastically, to which Cas and Charlie let go of their hug.

 

“Dean, this is Charlie.” Cas answered, Dean huffed and rolled his eyes.

 

“Well yes I got _that_ part!” Dean answered condescendinly.

 

“She's a girl I met yesterday in the library.” Cas cleared up, to which Dean finally nodded in approval, though he gave Charlie a shifty glance or two.

 

“Okay who wants to play monopoly?!” she asked, pulling the game out of her bag. Both boys looked confused.

 

“Don't you have homework?” Castiel groaned.

 

“Isn't that game banned from campus because two years ago a guy shoved the dice up his arse or something?” Dean drawled, receiving a shocked look from Castiel and a nod of approval from Charlie.

 

“Yes... But I don't think that should stop us from playing.” She grinned. Both boys eyed here with tired eyes.

 

“Look, I know it's not much comparing to what went down in the caf, but I'm just trying to help.” She said while opening up the board game and unfolding it onto the floor. Both boys sat down each on their own side of the playing board. After two hours of playing continuously, in the end, Charlie won. They played some cards, and then watched a movie.

 

And just when they thought she was about to leave, things got interesting. Charlie had brought them a bottle of Vodka, also illegal on campus, that didn't stop her. Dean wanted to know where she got all of this stuff, then again, he sort of didn't. Cas didn't take anything alcoholic, but Dean didn't even question it as he filled his glass and passed the bottle to Charlie. Slightly drunk, they all sat down on the floor and watched the first Harry Potter movie from Charlie's laptop.This was Charlie's favourite movie, she could recite nearly every word, and she did. It didn't bother the boys because Castiel was observing Dean, and Dean, well, Dean was very drunk.

 

“You know, we should do this more often.” Charlie giggled falling down and staring at the ceiling. She was still mouthing the words to the film.

 

“Yes we should! It makes this guy funnier!” Dean laughed propping himself on Castiel's lap. Cas was sitting on the floor with his back against his bed, he sure wasn't going to deny this.

 

“Dean, you know I'm not i-in-intoxicated right?” Cas stuttered a deep red appearing onto his cheeks.

 

“Then why are your cheeks red like mine?” Dean questioned as he layed his head against Castiel's chest. “Your heart is beating really fast Cas, are you okay?” Dean asked lifting his head concerned. Cas gulped.

 

 

“Yeah, f- fine.” Cas muttered. He pushed Dean off of him, “I'm going to bed...” Cas started but Dean stood up, and jumped onto Castiel's mattress.

 

“I'm going to bed too,” Dean patted the bed beside Cas, “Come join me?” He offered winking.

 

Castiel cast a worried glance back at Charlie, she wasn't any help as she was already sleeping on Dean's bed. Her laptop was beside her. Cas sighed and got under the covers with Dean, who put his forehead against Cas's.

 

“You have cold feet.” Dean pointed out, Cas closed his eyes and tried not to let his emotions fall out of line. He loved Dean, but he couldn't take advantage of Dean like this, besides. Castiel was a bomb, he hurt everything he touched, he didn't want to hurt Dean. His emotions needed to take a step back, and let him do what was best for everyone.

 

But one night? One night cuddling with his love? Was that going to hurt anyone really? Castiel sighed, Dean planted a soft kiss on Castiels cheek.

 

“Good night.” He whispered, Cas's heart fluttered and he put one hand against Dean's bear chest.

 

Castiel loved this, he loved every bit of it.

 

He loved every bit of Dean.

 

 


	6. Assholes, Asians and Absolutely failing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay yes I'm a little early on this chapter. Maybe it's the fact that I'm bored, or that I don't want to study, maybe I really like this fic or perhaps I just don't want to forget about it next week.
> 
> Who knows. 
> 
> Disclaimer: Blah Blah I don't own Dean, Blah Blah I don't own Cas. Man I'd be a stellar lawyer. 
> 
> Hello yes? Under NO circumstances is this fic to be reposted. Ever.

Dean woke up the next morning with a horrible headache, his head was pounding and his stomach felt like it had done twenty backflips in a row. When he opened his eyes, his stomach did thirty more.

Castiel was asleep right in front of him, their foreheads were _touching._

He would never admit it out loud. But... Dean liked it, he loved the way the boy in front of him seemed so fragile and innocent when he slept. His heart fluttlered, even though that's what he told himself, this could not be _just_  the hormones. This was something else, and Dean knew it. This was the way Dean had felt about girls, this was the way he felt about Cas. Taking a deep breath, maybe he wasn't all that straight, and maybe, just _maybe_ Cas wasn't either. What had the boy at the Cafeteria said? Something about being Cas's boyfriend? Maybe that wasn't all that bad... Maybe it was the start of something wonderful?

And maybe not. Because when you come out as anything other than straight as a plank of wood, you single yourself out forever. Your friends who are boys all become weary, and your friends who are girls might ask you to start drinking fruit? Let's be real, Dean could just not handle the fruity goddamn beverages. He was a fucking man. Nothing else, nothing feminine. But more importantly, nothing gay. 

Castiel stirred and moved a little, obviously waking up. He woke up slowly, and then all of a sudden his eyelids popped open.

“Hello, Dean,” Castiel muttered, shyly blushing a little.

“Hey Cas,” Dean smirked enjoying Castiel's reaction. He couldn't help himself. The internalized battle in his heart bantered some more. Dean sat himself his legs spread open onto the bed, watching Cas's eyes linger on his chest. Those sparkling eyes with so much potential fluttered everywhere so quickly. 

“Someone enjoys what he sees?” Laughed Dean, and an embarrassed Cas got off of the bed.

“Dean, with you it's nearly impossible to not like what I see,” Castiel answered picking out a pair of boxers and washed school clothes. He walked to the bathroom and closed the door to shower and change.

Cas was conflicted as well, he couldn't help but feel elated, maybe the boy was in fact the answer to all his calls. Dean was kind, funny, and a flirty drunk. He looked at himself in the mirror, we has still red from all the blushing and he felt confident. But some part of him didn't let himself get his hopes too high up. He knew a lot of things. But he knew above everything Dean was a cock-tease. Nothing more. It could never be anything more. 

Back in the room, Charlie had finally woken up.

“Hey Rapunzel, slept well with prince awkward?” Yawned Charlie sitting up on Dean's bed.

“To be honest, I don't remember much of it...” Dean responded his hand rubbing the back of his neck, “I'm so confused.”

Charlie rolled her eyes, exasperated. She too understood what he was going through. Ever since she had that little fling with Bella, everything had become a lot more confusing. 

“You two are so married.” She sighed tucking her hair into a pony tail, leaving her bangs loose. Dean contemplated this for a second, before answering.

All his tough guy attitude took over. He was a little defensive about this topic. 

“We are not, besides, I don't swing that way.” He answered with shallow cough. Charlie just laugh and mumbled an audible “sure you don't” before continuing to speak.

“And you expect me to just forget you and him last night? Or the fact that you are so _into_ him? The way you treat him and the way he looks at you man! I'm not an idiot Dean, fuck man! I'm a lot things, but I am not stupid. Look at you both. You're like a goddamn Shakespeare book. "Are you in love? What is thy love? Art thou afraid to be gay Dean?! Art thou any shame in being gay Dean?" You got too much internalized homophobia so you decide treat Cas like he's more than some goddamn one night stand that never happened? What the fuck is up with you. " She caught her breath, it was all getting to personal. Too emotional, she needed to take a step back from the whole situation,  "Besides, if you're confused, then don't lead him on man, it makes your head all cloudy and weird.” 

“It's just... No never mind... I don't... I'm...” Dean stuttered looking at his shoes frowning, “It was nothing.”

“Then now you're just pathetically toying with his emotions?” She pointed out flinging her hands in the air.

“I wish, I am not just playing with his emotions. I love the way he reacts when I flirt with him and the way he smiles and that cute little 'Hello Dean.' He's so great and I've never fucking felt like this for anybody else. ” He groaned pulling on his school tee shirt and dress pants. 

“Then you like him?” Charlie spoke stubbornly.

“No I-” 

"You want anything to do with him?" 

"Yes but-" 

"You think he's beautiful?"

"I do-" 

"Are you gay Winchester?" She yelled at the top of her lungs. He was hit by a flash back, saw his dad yelling those words at him, and each one hit him worse. He slammed his fist on the desk nearly breaking it. 

"No!" He yelled with all the breath he could make out. Those words, they burned, everything burned. 

“Pick a goddamn side! If you like him then you tell him.” She'd cut him off. She grabbed her bra and turned around to put it on. She had somehow taken it off before she had passed out in a vodka induced coma.

“You know Charlie, it's not always that simple!” He arrogantly lashed out. “I think he's amazing, until last night I blamed it on so many other things, 'cause who asks to be gay? Do you know how my dad will react if I tell him the first person I had feelings for at my new school was a boy? My dad would tell me to grow a pair and to stop acting for attention. Look at that Charlie, last night I was drunk and I did some things, I didn't mean to hurt his stupid homo feelings!”

“Dean Winchester, you are one arrogant child; being gay isn't a fucking curse! Stop acting like you're five, man! Think about how he feels and-” Charlie stopped and nearly dropped her laptop when the door to the bathroom opened, and out came Castiel fully clean and clothed.

“You- you know, these walls are paper thin.” Castiel spoke, his eyes were red and swollen and his lip was quivering. He had obviously heard the whole conversation.

“Cas I-” He spoke trying to look for acceptance.

“Please leave Dean,” Cas replied simply. Dean was in a stunned silence but quietly obeyed. He gathered the nearest school books he could find and left the room in an ashamed strut. When the door closed with an agonizing thud Castiel sat on his bed, he was shocked. Charlie came to his side sitting right beside him. A few minutes passed before Cas spoke.

“Why did he go and talk about how he loves me, but then he talks about how he can't love me. Charlie what is he even talking about, was yesterday just a joke to him? I don't understand...” He sighed regaining control over himself, Cas was so confused. One second Dean was complimenting him, the next he went on about how he didn't want him. The curious case of Dean Winchester indeed, thought Cas.

“Cas he's just questioning himself, he'll come around.” She muttered kindly to Cas, she put a hand on his shoulder but he shrugged it off and stood up.

“I should get to class.” He muttered, his head was down, he felt pathetic. He had opened up just a little and was shut down just as quickly. It was all a joke, Dean thought he was a joke. Oh sure they spent the night together, but Dean was drunk and Cas didn't know how to say no.

“It's not like you want to go.” Charlie huffed raising an eyebrow.

“No you're right, I do not,” he answered matter of factly. Cas felt awful, he knew Dean wasn't fully out of the closet. He knew Dean was trying to keep whatever 'they' were as just 'friends' and it hurt Cas. Every time Dean led him slightly on he fell for it, he couldn't help it. He was being offered a piece of cherry pie and he couldn't refuse it. Cas felt betrayed though, and he felt stupid. He fell for it time and time, and the way they looked at each other. Cas wanted to fling himself off a cliff. However, after what Dean said to Charlie, Cas was sure of everything now.

Dean was an asshole.

A mean, a hurtful, but a beautiful asshole, dammit. 

“Then don't go to class?” She sighed, jumping up and blocking the door way with a sad smile.

“I can't do that! If I skip class the teacher will tell the principal and he will call my parents which will blow up in my face!” He stammered. He tried to push his way through her (to get to the door and to class), but she was bony and strong. Sadly, Cas had a more of a slim and soft kind of body, it wasn't enough to fight. He soon enough was back on his bed and she was sitting on Dean's bed. They were directly in front of each other but she had a mischievous grin.

Charlie was going to be honest with Cas about how Dean had feelings, she even was going to give him a huge talk in the mom voice. But something held her back, she couldn't help but feel that he just needed to be distracted. Honestly, what Dean said had hurt her just as much as it had hurt Cas. 

“Dude, don't freak out, you can cut class with me.” She answered winking with a smirk tugging at her smile.

“How does that change anything?” He answered flinging his hands in the air desperately.

“Oh it changes everything,” she laughed, “ I'm blackmailing the principal. He doesn't write down that I ever cut class and he never gives me detentions, unless his wife wants to know that he's having an affair with the _evil_ Mr. Crowley, so no worries on the trouble part.” She answered him with a sly grin. Obviously she had found a way out, Charlie was good at that. She always knew how to do everything.

“Charlie!” he gasped, his eyes the size of two golf balls.

“Oh, come on, Cas, it'll make you feel better! When was the last time you took some time off?” She tilted her head waiting for an answer.

“Well, you may not remember but none of us went to our afternoon classes yesterday!” He responded slamming his books on his desk. He wasn't really in a stable state, Charlie knew better than to pressure him. She sighed and pulled out her laptop.

“Come on, let's marathon Star Wars.” She answered changing beds to be on Cas's. She put the laptop on her laps and they watched movies all day.

Charlie knew what she was doing, she loved the series and could easily explain anything Cas didn't understand.  
“What's a Sith?”  
“Why does it wear a robe?”  
“Can't it just show it's face?”  
“Is Anakin going to be a good father?”  
“Wait aren't they related?” All the questions and Charlie had all the answers. The best part though was that the movie marathon distracted Cas. It didn't remind him of Dean one bit. And when they fell asleep that night, Dean hadn't arrived in the room yet. Charlie slept in Dean's bed. But before falling asleep she sent an email to the principal explaining that Cas was sick and she was taking care of him.

Dean's day was going horribly. He felt awful. He was a total fucking asshole to Cas. He was a child. He was also now friendless.

But more importantly above all that, Charlie was right. He was playing with Cas's feelings. It wasn't right, but what could he do now? What's said is said, he'd spoken too quickly. He had a thing for Cas, and he sort of wanted to expand. However, Dean was confused.

The day went by slowly and painfully.

Math was hell, heck, Dean had no clue what the teacher was talking about. He barely cared. He trudged into the class, and walked out, he was in a daze. He fucked up and right now, he didn't care who he pissed off.

English class sucked, he had to present their project without Cas. They had their whole speech planned out but he did it all alone.

“Where's Castiel?” Miss Mills asked Dean with an uneasy tone of voice.

“I don't know.” He answered still looking at the ground.

“Don't you room with the guy.” She questioned.

“Is it plastered on my goddamn face? Did I not say I didn't know? Just let me present the fucking project.” He barked at her. She was quite speechless but let him present his project alone saying she would use the mark he had for both of them.

Looks like Cas won't be too happy with the grade, considering all the swears and the sad look she gave Dean when he was finished.

Lunch was fantastic, if you think eating alone in the side of the cafeteria is fantastic. Dean ate a bunch of noodles, and considering Dean's usual diet, anyone could tell something was wrong. A scrawny Asian kid tried approaching him but he shrugged the kid off. Ignored him even. Poor guy. That Asian kid looked like a fucking nerd. To be honest, if Dean wasn't going to be friends with Cas he didn't want to be friends with anyone.

Science was directly after lunch, the teacher, Mr. Crowley, was pretty horrible at teaching and he was subbing for Miss Harvelle. He took the attendance and let the class do what they wanted for the rest of the time. This turned out to be pretty horrible for Dean because he spent the hour and a half staring at the walls.

Last but not least Dean had the library for final period. It was also known as “If you can sneak Mr. Singer a 20 dollar bill you can sneak out and he'll write you as present.” But Dean didn't want to sneak out. This was one of the classes he didn't hate, and he really, really didn't want to go back to his room. So he opened a book and sat down at a table. He wasn't even reading, just looking at the words. 

His mind sort of automatically clouded. What had he been thinking? That he could pass off as some straight ass hetero kid who wanted to fuck a guy? No but seriously who the fucking hell did he think he was kidding? For fucks sakes, he wasn't even fooling himself!

“You okay boy?” Asked the teacher sitting down right beside him.

“Why are you asking?” Responded Dean avoiding the question. Mr. Singer gave him a sad look.

“Because you've got a book open and you're the last one in the library.” The teacher raised an eyebrow.

“Well sue me, I'm the only one who is staying for the whole actual class.” Dean sighed still holding his book up to shield him self from eye contact.

“Dean, class is over. The bell rang fifteen minutes ago.” Answered Mr. Singer, “and I'm aware you're so very enthusiastic about reading, but I'd like to get to my bottle of whiskey. So if you could bring the book to your room and read it there that would be swell.” Mr. Singer sassed. Dean finally put his book down and looked up.

“I'm an asshole.” He declared.

“Oh goodie, now we're getting somewhere.” Responded Bobby sarcastically.

“Look just forget it!” Dean stood up slamming his book onto the library table.

“Now boy,” Mr. Singer sighed, “Sit let's be a bunch of princesses and let's have ourselves a therapy group.” Bobby Singer drawled, the comment made Dean snicker and he sat down.

“Okay son, now what did you do this time?” Bobby questioned but before Dean could answer the same Asian kid that had bothered him at lunch thundered into the library.

“Charlie!” He yelled running to the table where Bobby and Dean were seated.

“Kevin, this is a goddamn library!” Bobby shouted back.

“Oh sorry!” the kid stammered, “I thought maybe Charlie would be in here. I've been looking for her all day.”

“She's in my room with Cas, probably.” Dean answered sullenly. He hadn't seen Castiel all day either, they probably were together.

“Oh- u-m are they uh- busy?” Kevin stuttered turning red slightly as his mind wandered a little bit too far.

“Pretty sure they're not fucking,” Dean answered bluntly. He was pretty certain they weren't doing anything like that. Well, at least he hopped. His stomach burned a little, jealousy. _No,_ he thought, _I don't care I'm not really gay I just like Cas._

“Why do you want to know boy?” Mr. Singer asked Kevin, back into business mode.

“Oh! Uh, yeah, she's my roommate, I haven't seen her in a day or two and I was wondering where she was.” Kevin answered them after regaining his normal composure. He had shaggy black hair that fell in front of his eyes, Dean didn't know the kid personally but he seemed like the typical, try-hard school kid.

“Yeah, if she's not in your room right now then she's sleeping in Cas's room, probably occupying my bed.” Dean responded he then rubbed his eyes. It was probably around dinner time now. He should go eat, he hadn't eaten dinner yesterday and barely ate today. He didn't feel like eating but his stomach had another idea. Of course, the fridge in his room was stocked daily by the school so if Dean was hungry he could have eaten there. That was, if he wasn't avoiding Cas.

“Son, can Dean sleep in your room tonight?” Bobby spoke up. Dean's hope lifted, he could crash in Kevin's room easily. Kevin nodded simply.

“Seriously? Thanks dude.” Dean answered Kevin and stood up. He gave Mr. Singer a kind look, maybe he wasn't the best at teaching things, or teacher things. But he sure as hell was the best mentor Dean ever had. 

Kevin and Dean left the library and went to Kevin's room. It was about 13 doors from Dean's room, not that he counted. Kevin opened the door and entered the room. It was obvious that both Kevin and Charlie were total geeks and weren't exactly very tidy.

The room smelled of coffee, and on queue he spotted a coffee machine in the corner of the room. A T.V was hung on the wall of one of the beds. Star Wars and Harry Potter junk ruled the floor. A bobble head Hermione sat beside a sonic screw driver on a shelf. The welcome carpet was blue with the numbers 221b written on it. A book shelf was completely dominated by Lord of the Rings memorabilia, including an elf crown and elf ears.

“That's Charlies bed, you can sleep there.” Kevin stated and opened a cupboard Dean swore was stacked with at least 200 bags of ramen. Kevin picked 2 and cooked them from the boiling water in the coffee machine. Dean was seriously impressed, considering his room had zero decoration and barely any furniture.

Both of them ate their ramen in silence, Dean sitting on Charlie's bed and Kevin sitting on his own with his laptop on his lap. After finishing the surprisingly good ramen, Dean grabbed a CD from the nightstand and put it in the DVD player hooked to the T.V. Turns out, maybe he should have checked what he was watching because he ended up binge watching 5 Doctor Who episodes before he fell asleep.

Dean fell asleep looking at the ceiling, Cas fell asleep staring at the walls. Both of them spent the time in between thinking about each other.


	7. Desperate Butterflies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anybody else watched Orange is the New Black? Idk bout you guys but I'm addicted to the show. You're all lucky I ended up updating! Hey guys I'm officially on summer vacation! Hell yeah! I'll be updating at least once per week, maybe more :)
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Dean, I don't own Cas. Don't repost this. Don't even think about it.

 

 ****  
Dean turned his head and saw Cas smiling; he loved the way Cas could smile. His hair was tousled and his eyes sparkled with kindness. However the happiness faded and the image changed, faded with the happiness actually, and he was now in a big black room. The walls seemed endless and he felt lost. A darkness washed over him and he felt a weight on his shoulders that he never expected to feel.  Sam was at one end of a long table, and he was at the other. Sam had grown, like really tall. Holy shit, man he should of done something with his hair. What year was this? Why the hell is Sam like this? He looked at Dean with intent eyes.  
  
"If you like him then tell him." Sam whispered to him, a kind smile had formed on his little (older?) brothers lips. Sam had both hands on the table folded one on top of the other. His stare was unreal, unnatural, and even a little creepy.  
  
" But I don't want to be like that..." Dean answered, he stood up quickly and the table shook. Sam stood up, and looked down at Dean. Sam's head twisted a little, concern grew on his eyebrows. Dean felt the need to cower, he felt hurt and pain and desperation. He couldn't take it.   
  
"Don't wanna be like what? Like yourself?" Sam muttered with a soft laugh. Dean pondered this for a second.

_Dean knew he liked Cas a little, maybe he was a little... Gay? Maybe those twisted feelings he'd been having. Maybe it was why he never really had liked any girl like he had liked Cas. Maybe... He felt a little light headed, was he that afraid to admit it? He felt a little relieved, maybe he could talk to Castiel about it. Oh wait- Cas! Cas still hated him. It hurt, it hurt a lot that he couldn't talk to Cas. He wanted to get all touchy feely with Cas. He wanted to see those blue eyes smile, and those lips tug at his cheeks. He wanted Cas to blush a little, blush for him._

 

_And those soft lips-_

 

He wanted to kiss them.   
  
Dean decided to sit back down, wanting to think of his options, but the chair was an empty space and he fell. He stumbled and tried to grab at everything he could, it was a failure as he could hold onto nothing. Panic rose into his chest. He was alone, and stumbling into unexplainable darkness. His hands and feet were flailing in the empty space as he finally hit the white ground. Traumatized, he stood up and took in his surrounding. He was in a white room, a room that seemed to stretch out for miles. At the end of the room stood Castiel. Castiel was smiling, but not at him.

_At another boy._

_Dean felt a pang in his chest. All his hopes sunk into the dark floor. So did he, his knees felt weak and he crumbled under the pressure. All those goals he had put for himself, everything he wanted to achieve felt like nothing when he saw Cas- his Cas, smiling at someone who would never love him the way Dean did. Who would never see him the way Dean did. Tears stung at his eyes, and his chest trembled._

  
"He's not an asshole, he's not a homophobe, and best of all," Cas's head slowly turned towards Dean and stopped. Half his face was gone, "he's not you!"  
  
Dean frowned and shook his head. He had finally found out what those feelings meant, he had finally accepted them. He knew everything he needed and now it was just useless. 

 

 _It was just too late._  
  
"No Cas! I'm sorry!" He started yelling desperately. He voice shook and he tried to cough out the roughness. It didn't help, he just wanted to die. 

 

 _He was too late._  
  
It hurt him so much, the other boy saying those horrible things about him. But they were true, Dean had been all of those things; was that really the person he wanted to be? He decided to tell Castiel the truth, what he had been hiding for so long. He wanted Cas to know. He needed Cas to know.  
  
"Cas I- I love you..." He stuttered in despair, to this Castiel shook his head and laughed but it sounded empty..  
  
"But Dean, you don't swing that way." Cas cackled, his nonhuman sounds echoing.

 _* * *_  
  
"Dean Winchester!" He heard a voice wake him up. He looked around the room confused. He got that weird feeling where he had forgotten where he was waking up. Everythng closed onto him. This obviously wasn't his room, and the girl with the flamboyant red hair seemed to know that.  
  
He touched his cheeks slightly, they were wet. His dream, everything he felt there, was unbelievable. 

  
"What are you even doing in here?" She asked still standing beside him. Her hands were on her hips and she was wearing a blue tee shirt with the words "In the Doctor we trust" written on it. Her eyes seemed to ponder whether rip his head off. She pretty much had every reason to.  
  
Charlie.  
  
He was in Charlie's room, in her bed. Only wearing boxers, and she looked pretty unimpressed.  
  
Cas.  
  
Fuck. He had been a dick yesterday. He had said some things he regretted. If that dream told him something it was that he needed to apologize. He owed Castiel an apology, and the truth. He rubbed the temple of his forehead. Was he ready to admit it? 

 

Yes. He needed to be. He needed to be truthful to himself for once. He needed to stop hiding his feelings under thirty pounds of emotional garbage and take a hold of his life. 

 

However, that wasn't the point. The point was that Cas deserved the truth. He liked Castiel like he had never liked any other human being in this world- And maybe it wasn't a bad thing. Maybe it was a very good thing.  
  
"Where's Cas?" He mumbled looking up at Charlie, she laughed and shook her head.  
  
"If you're going to mention the words 'I'm not gay.' to him, then I'd rather not have this conversation." She drawled rolling her eyes at him. She was obviously pissed, he had hurt Cas, he had been rude. Dean sighed.  
  
"I'm sorry." He rambled blushing a little. A hand fell from Charlie's hip, as she raised an incredulous eyebrow. She noticed he was extremely pale, maybe he did feel remorseful?  
  
"You're _sorry_?!" She laughed, smiling a little bit, "Dean, I don't want your goddamn apology. You said a bunch of homophobic crap and were incredibly rude- but not to me. You were an asshole to Cas, now pick your ass off the ground and go apologize Rapunzel!" Charlie yelled in a menacing tone, which made Dean run out of the room quicker than he should have.  
  
"I didn't think that would work." Charlie admired when she was sure Dean was out of hearing range. She had thought he would have yelled back, or even ignored her. That would have been what she expected from him, but he didn't seem alright, he seemed _shaken_.  
  
"Where were you yesterday?" Kevin asked Charlie, he was barely waking up and yawned, his hand quickly covering up his mouth.  
  
"Cleaning up the mess Dean's _gay panic_ made." She admitted and sat on her bed sighing. She extended her arms stretching.

* * *  
  
Dean ran to his room and knocked at the door quickly. The door felt unfamiliar, that's when he realized he had gone the wrong way.  
  
"Fuck!" He yelled racing back the other way as quickly as he could. The girl who answered the door was quite confused, and probably slightly irritated, but she closed the door wanting to get back to bed as quickly as possible. Thirteen doors right? That's what he had er- counted.  
  
He had finally reached his room door. Looking up he saw those big numbers: 666. His heart started racing quite a little, his mouth turned dry. He was the one at fault in this situation. What if Cas wasn't there? What if Cas didn't accept his apology?

More importantly, what if Cas didn't want Dean like Dean wanted Cas.  
  
Dean coughed awkwardly, he was the only one in the halls. It seemed to be pretty early in the morning. Maybe 5 or 6, class didn't start yet. His stomach became swarmed with a bunch of raging butterflies, they seemed to be more violent than actual butterflies. His mind raced, maybe Cas was asleep?  
  
The door opened, simply to prove him wrong of course. Had he even knocked? He didn't remember. Dean saw the messy hair, he loved those tired blue eyes.

Oh, holy shit.

Dean had never had the opportunity to see Cas up close and personal, to make matters better, Cas was shirtless. He had no real demarkations like muscles, he was sort of slim. Except for his arms, he had cute little biceps that probably could do more damage than they are usually thought to do. This was odd, Cas usually changed in the bathroom. He probably was in the same emotional state that Dean was in yesterday.   
  
To Cas, Dean was a mess. He looked like he had barely slept, his hair was all ruffled to one side and his eyes looked slightly blood shot. Cas noted that the slight red made no difference to those piercing green eyes. Freckles look spilt over Deans face like glitter against his pale skin, and his bottom lip was quivering slightly.  
  
"Hello Dean." Cas muttered hunching over and staring intently at his feet. Suddenly they seemed very interesting. Look at those nails, and those tiny stubby toes. Awesome! No not really... To be honest, Cas was just avoiding Dean's stare.  
  
"Uh- hey C- Cas." Dean stuttered. Which to Cas that was funny, Dean only stuttered when he was nervous.  
  
"Dean I need to-" Cas started but Dean cut him off very quickly. He grabbed Cas's left hand gently.  
  
"I'm sorry," Dean muttered silently, "I'm confused, and I led you on and that wasn't right. I just liked the way you looked at me. Like no one else ever did, and it made me all fuzzy. I- I just don't know my sexuality and I'm still not sure about it. I'm not sure about so many things Cas, I'm so confused." He continued to ramble on. Everything rushed out of Dean's mouth without a second thought. If there was one person he could tell this to, it was Cas.  
  
"I- I forgive you..." Cas answered, he was glad that Dean had formally apologized. Now came the second problem, Dean was still questioning himself. Which meant that the attraction Cas felt was still not mutual. Cas stared at his feet some more. Interesting.  
  
"I just- I like you Cas!" Dean met Cas's eyes. "Dammit! I like you and I don't know why!" He yelled desperately. Cas's heart skipped a beat, had he heard right?  
  
"Dean." Cas muttered, they were both still holding hands.  
  
"Uh, yeah?" Dean answered, he had calmed down slightly.  
  
"I think this is the part where you're supposed to kiss me." Cas added softly, a slight blush creeping across his face.  
  
Dean looked surprised at first, but he drifted his other hand and placed in the crane of Cas's neck, gently. He approached Cas slowly, making sure Cas was not going to pull back or something. Cas did none of this, so Dean took a slight step closer. Their lips touched a little, it made butterflies go crazy in both of their chests. Dean was too dazed to continue, so Cas deepened the kiss a little. Their soft lips collided smoothly together. It was ended as soon as it began, but both of them were calmer now, and a little relieved.  
  
They were a few centimeters away from each others face, every detail of their partner was easily seen. Dean noticed that Cas had pretty long and neat eyelashes that fluttered like the wings of a butterfly. Smooth lips that he wished were anywhere on his body at this moment. He shivered slightly feeling a little flustered.

Cas saw that Dean was even more drop dead gorgeous up front and personal, and he liked Dean better close and personal. Those star freckles, well, they became galaxies. Those green eyes, they were green with flecks of lime and yellow. Both of their pupils were dilated but only Cas noticed Dean's.  
  
Coming back to reality, Dean lifted Castiel's left hand that he was still holding up to his lips and kissed Cas's knuckles.  
  
"That was so..." Dean started, “I mean, Cas... I think I like you a lot.” Dean muttered adding a cute little smile that seemed to tug at his lips.  
  
"So much for 'I don't swing that way.'" Laughed Cas, imitating Dean.

 

***  
  
The day went fantastically after that, in English Dean and Cas were permitted to re-present their project.  
  
"For the sake of Castiel's grades", added Miss Mills with an approving nod. Although Miss. Mills wasn't an idiot, she had had a chat with Mr Singer and knew that Dean was not always as unstable as he was yesterday,   
  
At Lunch Dean and Cas ate with Kevin, Charlie and Bela. Both Dean and Cas had their fingers subtly intertwined together under the table.  
  
"I fucking ship it." Had announced Kevin when he saw Cas and Dean smiling. Charlie was in the back nodding as she received ten dollars from Kevin.  
  
"Destiel it is." Charlie grinned, both Dean and Cas were  _very_ confused.  
  
"What were you guys betting on?" asked Cas curiously.  
  
"I bet that you'd be together in about a week, she bet in the day." Kevin answered taking a bite of his sandwich and chugging his coffee.  
  
"The winner got ten dollars and got to choose the ship name." Continued Charlie. Dean gave a shy smile to Cas, and Cas returned it with a blush.

"Who's your friend?" Dean asked raising an eyebrow at Bela. Both girls laughed and their afternoon gossip just got a little more interesting.

  
The afternoon classes were pretty easy, Dean was so caught up thinking about Cas, time flew by him.  
  
The minute both their classes ended, they met up in Charlie's room, just like they had intended. Kevin made them all some goddamn awesome ramen, and Bela had come as well. She was the person Charlie seemed to be paying the most attention to. Kevin felt a little lonely, but when he brought it up Charlie told him that she had place for both of them on her lap.

That night, Cas, Dean and Bela all fell asleep in Charlie and Kevin's room. Bela was sleeping in the bed with Charlie, no one thought to much of it. Although Dean was now betting Kevin that they'd be together in less than a month. Kevin was sleeping on the floor, his laptop still on his knees. Cas and Dean fell asleep on Kevin's bed together. Their lips were still touching when they woke up the next day, Saturday morning.

 

 


	8. A Picnic with Cupid

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't 'own' these characters. But I did write this, those words are built from my sweat and tears. Don't be a dick and steal it.

These days you couldn't tell who liked you, and who was just flirting with you. There should be a label on people who want passionate one night stands and the few who want cute comfortable relationships.

 

Charlie would love to point out that she'd never put a label on it. She wants a relationship that feels like a one night stand every night. She wants the firery sex god emotion and the cuddles in the morning. She wanted to feel the love course through her veins and imagine the relationship as a challenging adventure. Yeah she liked sex, but just like anything else, she wanted to feel the adrenaline and the rush.

 

Today, was a very special day. To be honest, Charlie was pretty nervous. Her palms were sweating and Even though she wouldn't admit it to anyone but her self, she was getting butterflies in her belly. However they weren't any ordinary nerve wrecking butterflies. No. These butterflies had wings made of mixed feelings and had love tattooed on their backs. They were emo trash butterflies who probably should know better than to be bothering Charlie right now.

 

But she couldn't concentrate, he mind was pondering something else.

 

Charlie was sitting on a neatly spread out blanket on the grass. It was nearly a perfectly sunny day, the flowers were dancing in the wind and the grass wasn't even prickly. A basket woven out of paper with a cardboard bottom held two sandwiches and a special frizzy drink. She was wearing a dash of lip balm and had even made the effort to wash her hair this morning. (However that was a mistake as it was now a resting big bush on the top of her head)

 

She fiddled with her thumbs and began wondering whether she had made a error. Bela was already five minutes late, or wait? Maybe Charlie was just five minutes early? Who knows! All she knew was that the date she may or may not have blurted out seemed childish now. Why was she even here? Did she _actually_ expect a girl like _Bela_ to fall for a nerd like herself? Charlie was good at shop lifting a few things, but Bela was the one conducting the real black market at the school. Charlie thought she would look pathetic compared to Bela.

 

Oh this _was_ a mistake.

 

Well, it seemed like a mistake until she caught a glimpse at Bela strutting over towards her. She was wearing tight leggings that fit perfectly her skinny body and was wearing a peach blouse with layers of fabric that gave the idea of a waterfall. Her hair was tied in a bun with curly ends at her bangs and she was walking effortlessly in lethal heels. She looked glamorous.

 

Charlie on the other hand, did not. And she was _seriously_ starting to wish she had at least worn her cute _Marvel_ hoodie. What she was wearing however was a buttoned up plaid jacket and torn jeans. She had also added the classic touch of a black bow tie, but it was mostly there cause it reminded her to be confident. Her hair was curly and wild and it could as well have been hiding a bird nest in it.

 

Bela adored it.

 

She loved the whole look. Dressing high class and fancy was all Bela could do with her money that felt normal to her, but seeing Charlie over there with a very traditional outfit made her heart flip a little. Nobody could pull that look off easily, let alone with a pair of black converse shoes, but somehow Charlie did and hell it was a turn on.

 

"What are you smiling at?" Bela asked with a confident smirk.

 

Charlie couldn't seem to get an audible answer and she coughed and awkwardly handled the situation, "Well... Er... You?" A blush krept across her face and she poorly tried to hide it.

 

“You're aware that you've got a little red over... Actually you're just red all over...” Bela pointed out with a little laugh, but it only made Charlie redder.

 

“It's horrible, I'd love to know how people live without this evil curse.” Charlie groaned.

 

“Blushes are great though?” Bela scoffed and sat down, “Okay, no that was a lie. But you need to understand that it works to your advantage.”

 

Charlie reached into the basket and gave the girl who had an arm around her a sandwich.

 

“ _Sure_ it does. That's like saying that Rose Tyler was actually useful! The Doctor is useful, blushing is not.” Charlie rambled trying to tie her geeky comfort into an analogy.

 

“I tend to dissagree, I really did enjoy Rose's character.” Bela answered, “Besides, your rosy cheeks are cute.”

 

“No way! You've seen _Doctor Who_?!” Charlie gasped baffled.

 

“You do know I'm British ?” Bela answered with a grin and a laugh.

 

Both girls were so different and similar and then different again but it worked. Just like a book and a reader, a poster and the pins holding it up, or an teddy bear and a toddler. They couldn't be the same, cause that wouldn't work. What they are is to different people that compliment each other beautifully. It was more than that, those two needed each other. One could not function to it's full potential without the other. What's a book without it's reader caressing and smelling the pages, devouring each word with their mind? What's a poster good for lying on the floor? The pins aren't anymore useful in the drawers. What's a teddy bear good for without someone to love it? What's a kid without a friend to keep them company in the darkness of the night during a thunderstorm?

 

Maybe it was some little high school fling, but It just seemed like they were meant for each other.

 

As the afternoon flew by, both of them thought so too. Slowly but surely they had gotten to know each other. Both of them spent their time growing up without very present parental figures. They each had had their fair share of a shitty childhood. At some point, when all the food and drinks were gone, they just looked at each other for a very long time without saying anything.

 

Charlie was admiring everything, all the effort that seemed effortless that Bela did to 'take care of herself'. She was wearing a bucket load of makeup but Charlie was willing to bet her life that Bela was just as beautiful and flawless under it all.

 

Bela was focusing on the tiny details, it was the tiny sparks that made Charlie herself. The fact that her eyes lit up whenever someone brought up nerd culture. The way her pupils dilated when she got excited, and then she would blush and mentally kick herself for doing so. Oh and that hair, her hair seemed fiery in the sunlight and it looked like it could bounce and stay filled with all of it's texture for decades.

 

They didn't know it yet, but they were falling in love. Carefully during the end of their picnic they picked up and walked hand in hand to Bela's room. The wind seemed calmer, everything was going slower and all of it began to look more amazing.

 

It began to feel a little magical

 

Giggling Bela pulled Charlie into the room without hesitation. She winked and shut the door. 

 

The moaning of pleasure could be heard even through those thick cement walls. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello beautiful readers :3 I have the next few chapters planned out but I was wondering if there was anything specific you'd like to see in the future of this fanfic? Comments and feedback are always appreciated :) <3


	9. Some people have therapists, others; a bottle of vodka

**The Party**

 

The next few weeks were blissful. It's like everyone was living their own perfect paradise. Bela and Charlie had fallen for each other carelessly. Could you blame them? The night they had spent together had clearly helped their relationship grow, it wasn't only that... Charlie thought it felt magical. She had been searching a way to escape all this time and turns out her own bottom of freedom was love. They were no longer shy towards each other. Bela could spend all day playing in Charlie's bouncy locks and Charlie would spend that day admiring Bela with her eyes.

 

Finally, (and about fucking time) Dean had really decided to get completely rid of his 'no-homo' act. He was even considering telling his dad. That was a bad idea... And he knew it. But he also knew that if he didn't tell anyone it would be lying to himself like he had lied to Castiel. Truth be told Dean had loved Cas from the start, and he wasn't afraid of admitting it anymore. Nothing but Castiel mattered at this point. Those blue eyes caught him off guard and Cas's tousled hair could make Dean swoon, he was a little bit in love.

 

A little bit as in a lot.

 

And Cas, well Cas was just amazed by how well this was going. With all that they've been through Castiel was surprise that they had gotten this far. He knew he had a rough past. His family weren't exactly the most supportive, Dean didn't even know half of the stories that traumatized Cas. However, when Castiel looked at Dean, none of that mattered.  When they looked at each other, their pasts and problems melted away like wet paint.

 

It's like everyone had their own little slice of heaven. 

 

Except for well, Kevin... That wasn't really a game changer though. He was the glue that kept everyone together. They told him that he was the most loved of all. The way his eyes lit up at that moment, everyone knew that he had felt left out.

 

Dean and Cas had spent as much time together as they possible can. They spent their nights sleeping in each others arms. They walked to class hand in hand, and if they didn't have class together they kissed each other good bye. Everything was perfect. Unintentionally they fell deeper, and deeper in love.

 

Kevin was trying not to fail his classes, and was always reading or studying when his friends weren't there. He liked to think he wasn't doing well in school, which was probably true by his mothers standards, but in reality Kevin was second to the top of his class. He didn't really have a love interest but he kept his options open. Him and Charlie often did their class projects together, often claiming that they didn't want to confuse anyone else with their intellectual advantage.

 

The teachers were super accepting of the relationship blooming between the friends. Mr. Singer had given Dean and Cas a bottle of whiskey on their one month aniversary. Miss. Mills gave the gang extremely good marks and automatically put them together for projects. Even Mr. Crowley seemed to be less of a douche towards them. Ever since they had all really become friends, the principal never questioned their actions, they sort of owed that to Charlie though...

 

They loved spending time with together, they felt like a group of misfits, but together the puzzle made an amazing picture. Kevin was the logic and sensible one. Charlie was the little sister they wish they had never adopted. Bela was the sketchy supplier with an even more troubled past. Dean was the muscles who sold himself short. Cas was the not-so-innocent-innocent-one that was to be protected.

 

They stood by each other. Kevin's favourite line to people who tried to get him to do his homework was something that went, "Let's ask my  _best_ friend  _Dean Winchester_ over there! Did you know that he fights monsters in the dead of the night to protect his little brother. Heck, I hear he doesn't even sleep... So I can't really do your English project, I'm busy hanging out with him. I mean, if you want your project you'll have to fight him. I hear he doesn't lose often. " Okay so maybe it wasn't actually true, but it did keep the bullies away. 

 

It was a Saturday night, the night before thanksgiving break that they really had all gotten together. It had been a while since the team had hung out properly, and they saw the thanksgiving break a perfect opportunity. Everybody else in school was at the 'turkey' dance. Everybody else at school was floating around in a party dress having no desire for the responsibilities of their actions.

 

But not the Crew.

 

They had used the night as an opportunity to get drunk and play party games- they all knew how that was bound to finish. None of them wanted to go to the dance, claiming it was rather stupid. Truth or dare sounded like a good idea, actually Bela had thought of it. Something about her “getting to know them all better.” Kevin could of sworn that she knew them all perfectly and that Charlie had put her up to this. 

 

Charlie was leaning on Bela who was sitting on Dean's bed , and on the other side of the room, Cas and Dean were both cuddling on Castiel's bed. Kevin well, he had the shitty job of sitting on the floor, again.

 

They had all had a considerable amount of alcohol, it wasn't a party without a little alcohol. Dean was drinking directly out of the rum bottle. He seemed pretty heavy weight, him and Bela were able to handle more alcohol than everyone else. Bela's the one that started the game.

 

“So Castiel, truth or dare?” Bela asked, he seemed like the most innocent one in her eyes. She wanted to know how far this boy was going to go to cover up his his 'shy boy' act.

 

Cas tilted his head a little confused, but he quickly regained his composure, “ Truth.” he answered calmly. Dean smirked at his response, knowing Bela would ask something _completely_ inappropriate.

 

He was right. 

 

“Have you ever given a blow job?” She asked smirking, she was getting up close and personal really quickly. Even though she was new to this group of friends, she knew they liked to cut the crap and get to the facts quickly. Both boys cast glances at each other not answering the question, after a pause that felt like an hour-

 

Dean smirked.

 

“No way!” Yelled Charlie nearly jumping off the bed, she quickly regained her composure and cuddled Bela some more.

 

“How!” Gasped Kevin.

 

“Explanation. Now.” Bela ordered.

 

“Er well-” Dean started.

 

“Dean let me explain.” Cas affirmed, it was his truth or dare after all, and it was a memory he would always remember. Even when he grew old, even when he had children, he would remember that day...

 

_Dean and Cas well they hadn't done anything till the day of the Autumn dance. They had kissed, they had made out. But they hadn't done anything under the belt till the 31_ _ st _ _of October._

 

_That day, classes had finished, the day was almost done. Kevin was back in his room watching a movie. Bela and Charlie were running a couple 'errands' as it was a busy night for their businesses. Dean and Cas, were in their room, both boys had decided against going to the dance._

 

“ _Dean?” Tried Cas, he had grown quite reserved, he has sitting on the right side of his bed, completely facing Dean._

 

“ _Yeah.” Dean answered putting down his laptop._

 

“ _Do you ever want to try something new... but not really sure how to ask?” Asked Cas, he raised his head from his book. He seemed to be deep in thought._

 

“ _What do you mean?” Dean smiled and walked over to Castiel's bed, he sat beside Cas._

 

“ _I mean, you know,” Cas gestured to Dean in a vague confused hand motion, “taking our relationship a little further.”_

 

“ _Cas, I feel ready to try a couple things.” Dean smiled and bent over to kiss Cas's lips. Cas had one hand on the back of Dean's neck and deepened their lip lock a little. Dean, still not letting go of their kiss, positioned himself more comfortably at the back of Cas's bed, where he could have his back against the wall. The darker haired boy followed and sat on top of Dean, both their crotches right on top of each other._

 

_Dean inserted lust into their kiss, carefully occasionally sucking and nibbling on Cas's soft bottom lip. To this, Cas moaned into Dean's mouth and started slightly grinding onto him, Dean whimpered. They had been this far, it was what happened next that they had never tried._

 

_Cas let go of their kiss and sucked a little onto Dean's neck, carefully making a hickey each time. Dean moaned louder this time, one had gripped the bed and the other ran in Cas's hair. Cas to Dean's surprise, began rubbing himself against Dean's crotch area, this making them both easily distracted. Dean had become short of breath and to this, his breathing had become rough._

 

“ _C'mon Cas..” Dean mumbled, obviously wanting a little more to their casual make out session. Cas considered this, it was what he wanted to do. He smile a little, then he carefully spreaded Dean's legs and sat inbetween them. He unbuttoned the blond haired boy's pants pulling them down a little. He slowly caressed Dean's thighs and grabbed the boy's underwear and tugged them down._

 

_Dean bit his lip, knowing it was only a matter of time now. Cas licked his lips looking at the throbbing cock in front of him._

 

“ENOUGH” Cried Kevin, who was quite pale, “If you finish that story I will personally behead both of you.” He finished, faking a shiver of fear.

 

“Pathetic Kevin, I was getting horny just listening to those two.” Bela snickered winking at Charlie.

 

“Alright Cas, ask whoever you like, but do it before Kevin throws up.” Charlie continued, hoping to get the game moving. She wasn't really bothered by the blowjob talk, in fact it gave her a few ideas for her night with Bela.

 

Cas looked around the room contemplating his decision, “Kevin truth or dare?” he asked.

 

“Truth.” Kevin tried, eyeing Castiel with sad eyes.

 

“Would you have sex with Dean?” Castiel asked, his voice monotone.

 

“Nevermind, Dare! Dare!.” Kevin begged.

 

Cas thought of this for a second before heading to the fridge. He grabbed a bottle of ketchup, that was about half full, and threw it at Kevin. Dean chuckled as the blue eyed beauty sat back down with him, the Asian boy looked frightened.

 

“Eat it.” Cas told him, to this Kevin groaned.

 

“Why do I always get the gross dares?” He sighed and took the bottle of ketchup between his two hands, “Here goes my dignity.” He cried before squeezing the bottle and downing as much as he could of it, he became pale rather quickly and then ran to the bathroom claiming he'd be in there a while.

 

“Okay, Kevin is out. I'll ask next.” Dean claimed running a hand through his spiky hair. His green eyes darted across the room, his thoughts pondering every question and possible answer.

 

“Charlie, truth or Dare?” He asked her.

 

“Dare.” She immediately answered without a second guess.

 

“I dare you to eat Kevin's vomit.” He replied

 

“Truth! Truth!” She begged. Receiving a chorus of laughter, and an audible moan of pain from the bathroom.

 

“Have you ever fucked Bela?” Dean asked casually.

 

“Hell to the fucking yes, bitches.” Charlie declared putting an arm around Bela's shoulder protectively.

 

Before anyone else could say anything else Kevin stumbled out of the bathroom. He didn't look to well, in fact, he looked rather horrible.

 

“I'm drunk, I'm sick to my stomach, and I want to go home.” Kevin cried out to Charlie, she gave him a motherly look and untangled herself from Bela, stood up and grabbed Kevin by the shoulders.

 

“Come on dude, I'll bring you home.” She sighed in a nuturing tone, they both swayed out of the room, “Bye bitches!” Charlie yelled on her way out. Bela groaned and left with them, carrying Charlie's stuff.

 

Dean sighed as Bela shut the door behind her. He cuddled a little closer to Cas, their foreheads touching. He wasn't really in the mood for anything that exact night. He just wanted to sleep so tomorrows hang over would be less painful.

 

“Good night Dean?” Cas muttered planting a kiss on Deans forehead.

 

“Good night Cas.” Dean answered returning a soft kiss on Castiel's sweet, sweet lips.

 


	10. Kevin Tran is a Nuclear Bomb Waiting to Happen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking so long, I've been really busy on this new blog... (more info on that at the bottom ^.^ ) anyways, enjoy! :D
> 
> Don't steal this, come on I've worked really hard on it.

 

It was not a particular Monday, Charlie was out with Bela, and Castiel was in remedial for a math quiz he hadn't done so hot on. Everything was fine up until Kevin barreled into the room, confused and conflicted he sat onto Castiel's bed. His hands were shaking and his knees didn't seem to sit still. The bags under his eyes matched Kevin's black shoes. 

 

Dean stumbled out of the shower, drops of water were still running off of his nose when he noticed his friend in such a state. He tucked his towel a little tighter around his hips making sure it wouldn't fall off.

 

“Er, hey Kev'... You okay?” Dean muttered trying to understand what was going on.

 

“Do I look okay?” Kevin looked up, his shaggy hair getting in his eyes.

 

“What's going-”

 

“I'm a mess,” Kevin cut in. “I haven't been sleeping, my mom wants to put me on meds that are supposed to help study, my head constantly hurts and I just- I can't think straight...” He spoke in despair.

 

“But can you think gay though?” Dean tried faking a look of lost hope.

 

“Are you kidding me. I'm literally having a melt down and you're mocking my inability to function.” Kevin spoke in an offended tone. 

 

“Yes, Kevin. That was a joke.” Dean laughed and sat on the bed beside his friend. “Okay, so tell me what you need? Who do I need to beat up? I need a little more than a rant fest. You're a smart kid, if you wanted a chat you would of gone to Charlie or Cas, but you came to me. Give me the word, we'll do something about it.”

 

“ I don't know Dean... I guess I just want something to change. I don't want to be Kevin Tran; that Asian nerd who was the top of his class. I want to be somebody else! This lifestyle that I have right now is killing me. I'm dying from the inside. I need something to change.” Kevin rambled trying to make everything coherent.

 

“Okay.”

 

“Okay?” Kevin paused, “how is ANY of this OKAY?”

 

Dean rolled his eyes in exasperation. “Let me get dressed first and then we'll go shopping for a new personality, okay?”

 

“Yeah... Okay...”

 

* * *

 

The two boys were walking in the corridors. Kevin was following Dean, who seemed to know the general idea of where he was taking his nerd. Moments later they were knocking on the door of a senior. Thoughts of confusion were flowing into Kevin's brain but he couldn't seem to grasp any. 

 

Her name was Jo Harvelle.

 

Five seconds after Dean first knocked, the door was answered. These two were childhood friends, and after the knocking and a little whispering on Dean's part. They were allowed inside.

 

“Do you trust me Kev?” Dean asked and got a shaky nod as a response. He took it as a yes and tapped his friend on the back before pushing him inside. The room looked pretty normal, until you got to Jo's closet. The walls were plastered with pictures of models and there sat a chair in the middle facing a mirror. Bottles of products that Kevin could only guess the name of were neatly shelved.

 

It was a hair salon. She had a freaking hair salon in her closet.

 

“Oh no, no, no...” Kevin begged.

 

“Oh yes.” Jo answered for him as she sat him down in the chair.

 

“My mom will kill me. She likes my hair like this, she wants me to keep it like this.” Kevin muttered grabbing and tugging his hair.

 

“Exactly.” Jo responded.

 

“Which is exactly why we're cutting most of it off.” Dean spoke up.

 

“You've got to be insane!” Kevin nervously interjected his eyes darting from all sides of the room.

 

“You said you wanted change. Now calm down. This can't take all day, we've got a few more stops to make.” Dean affirmed.

 

“Awesome...”

 

* * *

 

Kevin's hair looked better than it had ever looked. The shagginess was all gone and his hair was now shorter and more clean. Kevin smiled in the mirror, and the people behind the reflection smirked. Dean paid Jo a twenty and they were off once again.

 

They did a few more stops like that. They stopped at the pharmacy in the school's lobby where Dean bought Kevin some 'all natural sleep inducers' as well as a few stress relievers. They stopped by the library and asked to see Bobby's CD collection. It was vast.

 

“Rock or punk?” Bobby shrugged like this question was asked every day.

 

“Don't you have anything classic?” Kevin added in a little distressed tone.

 

“He'll take rock.” Dean corrected.

 

They then moved on, and went to Ruby's room for some sugary candy (Kevin's mom didn't want him to have any.) And finally, they finished in Charlie's shared bedroom. They both looked at the pile of stuff that had been dumped onto Kevin's bed. That's when the lecturing began.

 

“No more caffeine.”

 

“What?”

 

“It keeps for brain up too long, it's messing with your head.”

 

“Okay...”

 

“Each morning, I want you to wake up and take a bite of a chocolate bar.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Don't question it.”

 

“Fine.”

 

“Are you writing all this down?”

 

“Yes sir?”

 

“Good. Stick it on your wall after.”

 

“Alright.”

 

“Before going to bed you take some sleep inducing shit, good?”

 

“Yep!”

 

“After arriving from school, you'll listen to some music and then watch one episode or movie before getting to homework.”

 

“What? Why?”

 

“Don't you get it Kevin. You've been hard wired to listen to instructions and take notes, this is exactly what you're doing right now too. Man, your stress is taking a toll on you. You need to let your mom's worries go, you need to stop stressing over grades, and you need to understand that whatever happens. Happens. But your mental state needs to be in a healthy state. You can't live like this Kevin, you're dying.” Dean finally finished in a rough breath. The pile on the bed had been neatly sorted.

 

Kevin sighed and sat down. He opened a bag of skittles and slowly ate a few.

 

Dean smiled before leaving Kevin alone for a while, he hoped he had helped this kid a bit.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Did you enjoy that chapter? I bet you did! Man did I enjoy writing it! Okay so more info on this super secret blog.... My friend Alex and I have basically began writing fanfiction on commission. Anything from reader inserts, to smut and imagines. Everything is super cheap :) Check it out loves! 
> 
> fanfiction-lovely.tumblr.com


	11. Tabarnak que c'est quétaine, mais je t'aime

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, school started! Hope you guys are doing okay? Feel free to talk to me if anything's upsetting you. Anyways yeah, so I'm updating! I can't promise a date for the next chapter yet since my schedule is hectic, however I will do my best to get something else up in the same month.

Dean and Cas were both leaving for Christmas. 

 

Tomorrow morning, Castiel would hop in a car with his other siblings and be driven to a week of hell. Dean on the other hand was probably walking to the nearest bus stop. 

 

Cas was going to his Family, Dean to his dad and brother. Neither felt like leaving, in fact, they both dreaded the idea. Every year it was the same pattern, and every year it hurt them both a little too much. Dean knew he would return with a couple more bruises, and Cas knew he would return with the feeling of being broken. They both knew that one day, they would not be able to come back, that they would both be ruined.

 

Broken beyond repair.

 

It was the day before Christmas break, Charlie was already gone with Bela, they were both spending the break together. They didn't really have families to disappoint. Kevin had left two days before Charlie, his mom had picked him up extremely early, she wanted him to “get ahead in his studies”. Basically the gang of ranging hormones and misfits were getting separated for about three weeks.

 

They weren't sure if they could handle it.

 

Dean was in his dorm, sitting on his bed. He had just finished packing and was waiting for Cas to come back from the library. Cas had insisted on renting a few more books so he could fully isolate himself once he arrived home, Dean really couldn't blame him. He had asked Charlie to download the ten complete seasons of  _friends_ onto his laptop so he had a reason to ignore his own father.

 

Both of them had low expectations for Christmas break, it ended up being a thousand times worse.

 

What Dean was focusing on was the now. He was focusing on the moment Cas would come into the room. He was waiting for those beautiful blue eyes to light up. He couldn't wait for them to smile, he couldn't wait for those furry little eyebrows to wiggle. He was focusing on the moment where he could make Cas remember that he was a reason for Cas to come back from the Holiday break.

 

Not that he would admit it but he was giving himself a reason to come back too.

 

Cas was gathering his books from the nearby library desk, he had rented ten books. Mr. Bobby said it was five over the limit but he 'didn't see anything'. He calmly left the library, his footsteps to reach his room were heavy, the faster he got to his room would be the last time he saw Dean before the break. The last time those green eyes lit up till the next time he saw them, he would see Dean next year, well technically. That on it's on felt terrible. They had gotten over so many fights and stupid discussions. Castiel couldn't lose Dean. He was all Cas had. He was one of the only things that Castiel actually thought was worth living for.

He reached his door and pulled his keys out to open it, Dean was sitting on his own bed with his laptop. His legs were outstretched and spread across the sheets. Dean's hair was a mess, Cas couldn't remember the last time he saw him wash it. But Castiel smirked. 

 

Dean was beautiful. 

 

He meant it in the most  _quétaine_  way in the world. _Quétaine_  is french word that some how means tacky,cute,corny and usually an action done in the name of love. All at the same time. Castiel learned that word recently, he thought it was accurate.Oh, how Dean would walk him to all his classes. Hand and hand. Before entering Dean would give a peck on Cas's lip. Now that was a  _quétaine_   thing to do. 

  
  


“Hey Cas.” Dean groaned taking off his headphones and standing up. Cas got so lost in thought he forgot about the art sitting in front of him. 

 

“Hello Dean.” Cas answered dropping his books carefully into his bag. He put his own luggage beside the door, before sitting on his own bed. The room itself wasn't empty but it felt lonely, Dean sat on Castiel's bed with an arm around Cas.

 

“So...” Dean Started letting his head fall down slightly, “what are you doing for Christmas?” he uttered. Trying to awkwardly make conversation. Usually Cas handled the awkward talk, but oddly today Dean was taking over.

 

Both boys just felt so useless. If only they could spend their break like Charlie and Bela. Together and in love. 

 

“What do you think?” Cas smiled like he couldn't believe the question, “ I'll be missing you.”

 

Dean's head popped up and a smile tugged at the corner of his pink lips, “that's not what I meant” he laughed as his face turned a little red. 

 

“I know,” Cas sighed planting a gentle kiss on Dean's left cheek.

 

Dean tilted his head a little, “you missed.” He grinned planting a gentle kiss on Cas's lips. However, unlike any casual kiss, there was no break from their lip lock. Castiel lied down on the bed and Dean climbed over him carefully maintaining their kiss. Their endorphin's kicked in and it became more playful. The green eyed boy slowly grinded on the person under him softly.

 

Castiel moaned a little as Dean made his way to his neck carefully sucking and nibbling, gently creating a bruise. Dean groaned still biting Cas's neck and hearing the groans and moans on the one under him, making both of them considerably harder. Crotch over crotch now, Castiel starting to become very aroused and was gripping tighter on Dean's shirt, he didn't want to fall out of this moment. He didn't want to leave for the break. He was tracing under Dean's shirt with his fingers. Hoping to remember every bit.

 

He wanted to memorize this moment. 

 

Dean was itching for something more. He knew that they had never gone all the way, and he wanted this to be a first. He had come from so far: he used to be a homophobic jerk who was hiding his feelings. Now, he's rubbing his hard cock along another boy, and all he wanted to do was to make sweet love to his angel. He knew everything was different from before, and he didn't regret one bit of it.

 

Carefully Dean unzipped his own pants and worked his way to unzipping Cas's. They took their clothes off in a slight hurry. Dean didn't even wait till Cas's pants were full off of him before planting gentle kisses on the inside of Castiel's thighs, running his tongue along what he could. This wasn't simple love making, it was rushed, it was rough and it was urgent. They needed each other. They needed this. 

 

Cas moaned and groaned squirming under Dean's chest but before Dean could do anything else he spoke, “Dean,” Cas uttered softly catching his breath, “can we try something?” he panted. Dean nodded furiously, his green eyes wild, his pupils dilated.

 

To this Castiel flipped over, raising his ass a little in the air. Dean adjusted and moved on top of Cas, he slapped his rear a few times. Grabbed his own dick and started inching it inside of Castiel. 

 

The screams could be heard across the hallway.

 

They were finally doing something they've been wanting to do for a while.

 

* * *

 

They lay beside each other on the bed, their hands swiftly touching each other. Their breath was paced with a rhythmic beat and their excitement was slowly fading. They were left with only their warmth. The feeling that they never wanted to leave each other. They were perfect for one another. Everything fit together in every perfect way possible. Those constellations that painted Dean's eyes with the most beautiful poetry known to man had been carefully mapped into Cas's head.

 

They were one.

 

Everybody wishes that's how the story would end.

 

However, I'm so sorry. 

 

This isn't a happy story.

 


	12. Christmas (HELL) Break Part 1/2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If you didn't want to read something sad I suggest you just stop at Chp 11

In some cultures Christmas is the best thing, it represents family and togetherness. For others, it means nothing.

 

Cas dreaded the holidays. Usually this time period was about 'family time' and 'joy'. But, how did you enjoy some family time when they had the gift of taking away your joy? 

 

His mom was never present, her excuse was always something along the lines of 'stuck at work, don't wait up.' Cas suspected she was up to more than just work but he never said anything. The bills were paid and nobody asked questions.

 

Shut up and don't talk. You probably don't have much to say anyways.

 

His father was a delusional writer, he spent months locked in his tiny room that smelt nothing like cleanliness. Through the liquor and bottles of old wine he wrote himself into his stories and believed they would come true. Castiel had nothing of this, and when his father left five years ago, he was relieved. However, the relief was short lasting and the grief and loneliness stayed.

 

Most of the time it was only him and his three siblings; Lucie, Gabriel and Hannah.

 

Hannah was his favorite. She was young and innocent and he loved the way she was so careless. Anything that didn't immediately affect her, didn't matter. Cas could never be like that, he blamed himself for practically anything. He couldn't help it. But what fascinated Cas more than anything was how dangerously loyal she could be. The day that she would become loyal to herself, will be the day that Castiel will fear his little sister. 

 

Gabriel was the clown. He was a magnet of attention, he needed and wanted all of it. It was a problem for him, everything was about how funny he was or how hurt he felt. If Cas got a minute of attention, Gabriel wanted an hour. It was a never ending competition, but to be honest it was only one sided. Castiel couldn't care less, he knew that deep down his brother was a practitioner of the motto 'laugh through your pain.' 

Lucie,to describe her would be overwhelming. She was not Castiel's favorite. In fact, the last time they saw each other, a lunch tray hit the ground. If Dean knew who that bully he punched really was, Cas was sure he would never hear the end of it. Not that it wouldn't come up at Christmas dinner of course. 

Castiel was waiting for school to start. He wanted to smell Dean's hair and kiss his skin, he needed something to keep him going a little longer. He could wait a break if Dean could too. 

On one hand Dean could say he hated Christmas break but, he'd be lying. Christmas eve was one of his favorite days of the year. He knew he didn't have a model family, and sometimes it hurt more than others. He would have to endure his father's on/off presence for the whole entire break, however, on Christmas eve it would only be him and his brother.

As always his father would spend Christmas with the rest of the bar regulars.

Sam was Dean's true family, and that was what Christmas was all about. Sam was so close to Dean it was embarrassing. When they were young and they both went to elementary school, Sammy would dress like his big brother everyday. He loved his little brother Sam. Whenever he thinks too long about the next time he'll get to see him a pain fills his abdomen. He missed him so much.

For one Christmas eve, they would sit by the fire and drink eggnog. They would laugh and share stories about school, Dean even thought of telling him about Cas. It was weird, every year, that exact night reflected how Dean felt about his little brother. They were siblings living through hell, but together. 

\- - -

The day after they had gone at it, Dean walked the halls standing at a 'we're friends but we're not fucking' distance of Cas. They weren't holding hands but damn they wanted to. They couldn't though, he hadn't come out to anyone in his family yet, and neither had Cas. They both knew it wouldn't be very welcomed. So they didn't even hug when Castiel said goodbye to Dean. They didn't even kiss. Their hands didn't even touch. 

They looked into each other's eyes and somehow they knew. They knew something would happen. But it was a flash, Cas's eyes glimmered and Dean's soul shined. 

When Dean sat on the cold bus bench, beside a man who was taking up two seats with his dog. His eyes fell asleep before his mind had the chance to notice. Castiel's pale face was painted into Dean's head. Those blue eyes and that shaggy hair. The moment he waved good bye and saw Gabriel shove his brother into the back bench.

It was a memory that haunted him, every night. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> STAY TUNED, CHRISTMAS (HELL) PART 2/2 WILL BE UP ON THE 25TH OF DECEMBER, CHRISTMAS DAY :D


	13. Christmas (HELL) Break Part 2/2

Word got to Bella first, she was in fact the center of most knowledge. Bella nearly dropped her phone as her trembling hands told her girlfriend to email everyone else. 

Kevin saw the message fifty two seconds after it was sent. He grew pale and immediately asked his mom to drive him.

Dean had arrived home, made Sammy dinner. They ate, like a family. His father wasn't here and they doubt he would show up. Once Sam had gone into his own room, he flipped his laptop open, a flashing red message bleeped in the right corner of his screen. He ignored it for a few minutes as he wanted to play his own music first. Dean opened the email last. He had just gotten properly seated, as some Christmas music chorused in the background. His heart flipped, and then he felt sick. He got up almost immediately, ignoring the laptop that crashed to the ground.

"Sam!" His voice trembled. With no response, he ran into his little brother's room. The kid had his headphones in and took them out with a confused look. 

"What?" He questioned skeptically, he'd never seen his brother look this shocked. Dean's whole body was trembling and he was as white as a ghost. 

"We gotta go..." His voice was raspy and losing half of it's power. 

Sam didn't question it, he threw is coat and shoes on. Dean didn't even worry about that, he walked outside with untied shoelaces and in the shirt he wore earlier. 

He didn't even write a note on the counter. 

They walked in silence to the bus stop, Dean paid ten dollars for him and Sammy. It was too much and he knew it, he just didn't want to take the time to count everything. It would be time uselessly wasted.

The hospital corridors were so gloomy at night. Most lights worked but if you looked outside you could see how dark everything was. 

It's the crash that changed everything. One second Castiel dared to say one off comment to Lucie and Gabe.   
  
When Dean walked into the room the setting changed. There was a family around Castiel's bed. Some faces Dean recognized. Some not so much. The first face Dean comprehended was the bully from school sitting in a corner. He remembered the time that he had swung at her in the middle of the cafeteria. Her eyes were deadly fixed on the hospital bed. Gabriel was holding some vending machine junk and seemed to be ignoring the whole situation all together, it might be his coping mechanism kicking in. His mother, a tall woman with her back held firmly was on the phone. The whole situation seemed to be a nuisance to her. Dean assumed that the tall one standing right beside the mother was Michael.  Every once in a while Michael would turn around and cast a glare at Lucie.  
  
Dean was still standing in the doorway before anyone noticed him, "what happened." He spoke firmly. One by one the people turned to him and shot him a confused glance.   
  
"Dean." The bully of the room stated, "come talk to me outside. " She sneered.  
  
"Huh?" Dean asked, still lost in his trail of thought.  What happened to Cas? The frail body in the bed seemed distant as the tubes in his nose were supplying him air.  
  
"Dean!" She growled, "outside. Now."  
  
"Why are you even here?" Dean questioned.  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"You're a straight up ass to Cas at school. I just don't understand why you're here. Why kick him when he's down? I thought that took all the fun out of your sick twisted games." The sister smirked in a threatening way but Michael spoke before she could do anything.  
  
"Enough.  Lucie is here for the same reason I am. She's here to support her brother. Now I know that everyone's way to grieve is different but if you're going to become a threat you will be sent out. " Michael intervened. He gave a glare that was supposed to be intimidating, but it was not at all. Lucie smirked, Dean hadn't considered that she might have been family. After the way she treated him at school. That's not what family was supposed to do.  
  
"Please. Come outside and talk with me." Lucie repeated in a fiercer tone, Dean's focus was brought back to reality.  
  
"Look. What you have to say it can either wait, or you can grow the fuck up and say it in front of your precious family." Dean snapped.  
  
"I want you to stop seeing Castiel." The mother spoke up, dusting her pantsuit for stray bits of dust.

Everyone in the room shuffled awkwardly. Lucie rolled her eyes. 

  
"Excuse me?" Dean growled.  
  
"I want you to- "  
  
"No, I understand what you said. I'm giving you the chance to change it." Dean sneered.  
  
"Dean you're corrupting him. You're making him a sinner." Lucie took a step forward.   
  
"Believe me, I know that he's been a bad boy" Dean laughed with a wink.

Laugh through the pain, the Dean Winchester solution.  
  
Sooner than Dean expected it, Lucie's hand glided across his face in a sickening slap. The people of the room looked at the ground. Dean didn't have a chance to say anything or to even move. He was in shock. 

As if time had stopped and was working in stop motion, Charlie was standing in between them. She was toe to toe with Lucie. Their noses were practically touching.   
  
"Listen up," Charlie barked. An audible mutter of "She's fucking crazy." Could be heard behind her, Dean guessed that was Kevin. He only realized Bela was there when she whispered even quieter, "Crazy fucking hot."

  
"You're going to take a step back, you're a fucking bitch but this isn't the right time." Charlie threatened, "we're the friends that were there for him when you guys weren't. We deserve to know what's going on and as much time with him as you do." 

"Where's Kevin?" Bela muttered to herself.   
  
"Or what are you gonna do?" Lucie sneered tilting her head, as she approached a little bit, "what's the queer gonna do to me?"   
  
Charlie licked her lips and thought about it for a few seconds. Her lips were nearly a centimeter from Lucie's face and she puckered them, "or I'm gonna kiss you. I'm gonna kiss you hard. I'm gonna run my gay lips all over your gay body, and even nibble your neck a bit. But you won't push away, cause deep down you'll love it." She whispered the last part in Lucie's ear.   
  
Lucie reddened and then became awfully pale before she left the room, the rest of the family followed. The mother was walking after her daughter, Michael was a few centimeters from his mom. Soon later, Gabe seemed so spaced out that he forgot his family had exited. He blinked a few times and returned to the chair Lucie was occupying earlier. He sat alone looking at his brother.

Dean's breathing was rough, paced and fast, Charlie simply exhaled as they rushed to the bed where their friend lay. Now, they would be able to get a good look.

He was so fragile and looked like a doll. His pale skin was reflecting the sunlight and his dark hair was in greasy strands, the problem was that half that grease was probably blood, crusted and cracking. The top of his head hds stitches and the dark circle under his eyes told them he wasn't doing all that great. The only sound in the room was the beeping of the machine.

Dean held his hand and kissed it a little, the little tears on his face were slowly disappearing into his boyfriend's sleeve. Charlie closed her eyes as Bela held her. 

"They don't know how he'll turn out." Gabriel muttered, everyone else had forgotten he was there, "He's got a sever concussion that ended up screwing with his whole brain. He's in a coma and they don't know if he'll wake up." 

This couldn't be happening, thought Dean. He didn't want this to be happening. His eyes stung some more as he held Cas's hand tighter. 

"How... did it happen?" Bela uttered. 

Gabe nearly laughed at that one, "he sat in the middle. Except, the middle seat belt doesn't tie well. He said something, my mother made a sharp turn and bam. We never saw the truck coming. Cas flew from the back seat to the front window. The blow could have killed him. I guess... if he doesn't wake up then he's dead anyways."

Dean's silent crying turned into silent sobbing.

"My mom says that if there's not any brain activity for a week, we're unplugging him. 'He'll be better up there with the angels,' she said." 

Gabe stood up and walked out of the room, slowly his footsteps left a deafening sound in each of their ear drums. He closed the door, "I'll let you say your goodbye's." 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> * * *   
> MERRY CHRISTMAS (Or whichever holiday you celebrate!) I hope you guys spent some times with your families and got a few gifts. Good bye! (You might need to convince me to write something more to it because I feel like stopping it here.)


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